Broken Promise
by waterrain
Summary: Misunderstandings can lead to breaking a bond between two brothers and cause bitterness. A story about Regulus Black of his love and loyalty to his elder brother that remains through out. Regulus Black's story is heart breaking.
1. Prolog: Broken Promise

I do not own harry potter. Regulus view.

**This means short poem. (Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad)**

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Sirius use to talk to me before he went to Hogwarts. I know he doesn't believe in what our parents says, but even he doesn't speak up. I had a feeling that Sirius wouldn't be in Slytherin. Of course I didn't want to tell our parents that for they would have yelled up a storm and demand to know why I thought my older brother won't become a Slytherin. I remember Sirius promising to write to me and inside I was happy for I could show it too much for it is against the Black Family code. Even though our mother breaks that at times with yelling, screaming, and so on. I guess we can't show happiness I guess.

I found out Sirius was in the very very last house that our parents wanted him to be in. It was Gryffindor and our parent's were not happy at all. They sent howlers and caused an uproar about it even threating to take him out f Hogwarts. It was only been two days, but I was tired of all the talk that our parents did about Sirius. Talking about how they would might disown him, about sending him away, about taking him away from Hogworts, and I knew Sirius always wanted to go to Hogwarts. Claimed he liked the name and found it funny. So I decided to lie and cover up for my older brother Sirius.

I told our mother "Maybe Sirius wants to spy on them and explore their weakness so that in later fights he can use it against them. When he fights against those blood traitors and mudbloods. He could use their emotion against them. To blackmail, To hurt them, To make them beg, To make those mudbloods see that they are worthless compared to a Black, and powerless too."

Our mother smirked then repiled "Oh yes that must be it. That is cruel, That is evil, and that must be the reason why a Black was sorted into that damn house. He must have threatened the sorting hat. He must be pretending to defend them from us to win their trust."

A month went by and Sirius didn't write to me. I wondered why he broke his word, but maybe Hogwarts was just that wonderful. I guess I must write to him and maybe he was having so much fun he forgot to write that must be it.

I wrote on the front of my letter From The Black Family after all every letter I write I put that on the front.

_Dear Sirius,_

_How are you doing right now? I already know your at Hogwarts. What is it like at Hogwarts? Who are your friends? Are you having fun? Do you remember your promise of writing every week to me. It's been a month and if you were worried about our parents reaction. I took care of the talking to them and you won't be leaving Hogwarts. It's alright your a Gryffindor, but you spare maybe two minutes to write to me. Maybe writing 'Hi, Regulus. I miss u. Love your older brother.' Or even 'Hi, Reg. Miss you. F SB' it would only take a minute or less. I hope your doing well, hope you have nice friends, hope you are happy, and hope you can write. I also hope you are not hurt and that your hand is not broken. I miss you and the house seems empty. You can even write 'Love u Reg' that would be only ten seconds. Heh, you can even write L U R that would only three seconds. _

_Anyway I have been reading more of the books here and I have learned more stuff. Well I must end this letter soon for it's almost dinner time and Mother will be yelling dinner time. In ending be safe and have fun at Hogwarts. _

**_Love your Younger Brother,_**

_**Regulus A Black**_

**-At Hogwarts-**

_Sirius took one look at the word The Black Family, not bothering to open it he tossed it at Snape, and laughed loudly. James, Remus, and Peter smiled at Sirius. Snape sneered, but opened the letter up and saw the words at the bottom_

**_Love your Younger Brother,_**

**_Regulus A Black_**

-Back To Regulus-

I waited for a week for a reply, but I never recieved one. I tried to think up reasons as to why he would not write back. Maybe he was still having lot's of fun, Maybe he hates me, Maybe he thinks I hate him, Maybe he forgot, or Maybe he forgot about me. Maybe he just doesn't care enough to write, Maybe he thinks I'm annoying, Maybe he thinks I'm ugly, or Maybe that I'm fat. Wait Blacks do not worry for they do what must be done. I will fix everything and it will not fail. Since then I ate once a day which was dinner plus an apple. I made sure to scrub my face to make sure pimples will not appear even though that usually happens at the teen years, but better safe than sorry. I did all kinds of work outs and I still waited. I promised myself if he wrote back then nothing is wrong with me. I wrote every single week and yet still no reply. Sirius never replying was what hurt the most, I had cried into my pillow many times, I know it is shamefull, but my own older brother hates me. I waited a few months before I sent one every day.

My final letter was the day before Sirius goes onto the train and be back home.

_Hi, Sirius. _

_You really must hate me, you must think I'm useless, annoying, stupid, ugly, worthless, and so on. Heck you MUST find me to be FAT, but you don't need to worry about it for I took care of the problem even though the healers had told me that I was the perfect weight about one month before you left. After a week with no reply I decided to start my diet of one meal Dinner and an apple. Well our parents didn't notice after all I think that would, but I was wrong. Just like I was wrong when I think you would write every week. You might be wishing I was never born. I'm not stupid for I read every day, I'm not ugly for I scrub my face every day, I'm not worthless since if I die then our family would get some money, and I'm not useless for the same reason why I'm not worthless. So I guess the winners are annoying and fat._

_To be honest I was hoping that you would at least once to prove me wrong and I guess your friends mean more to you. Your wishing to never leave and dread coming home. At least say Hi to me when you return home then I'll be happy. _

_Love, Regulus Black_

**-Hogwarts-**

Sirius had started a Tradition of throwing all letters from The Black Family at Snape and walking away. Snape read everyone of them and knew it was not from Black's parents, but from Black's younger brother. Of course Snape didn't tell Black about it. Black never told anyone that he had a younger brother named Regulus.

_-Back to Regulus-_

When my older brother returned he didn't bother saying 'Hi', he sulked around the house, and mother is back to yelling. My eyes were dry and I notice him writing letters amost every day to his FRIENDS. He never sent me a letter, but yet writes almost every day to his friends. His friends mean more to him than me and that did hurt, but my eyes no longer leaked out tears. My tears are dry, but my quiet laughter was still here. Sirius didn't talk to us, Mother seemed to be buying the lie, or maybe in denial about it all. I got my letter, Strange I do not feel as happy as I should be feeling about it. Sirius just ignored everyone and just kept on writing. I did not yell at him about never writing back and kept it bottled up. Sirius didn't notice I lost weight or anything. Of course I guess I do not matter to Sirius. He must know that I'll be in Slytherin. I have to be in Slytherin to keep to the Tradition and won't shame the family as my mother says. I got all of the things I needed for Hogwarts. I named my black owl Suiris and I smiled.

Soon it was time for the travel to the train that shall take us to Hogwarts.

**_I didn't know it was a lie,_**

**_That he would forget his promise to me,_**

**_That he would find me to be annoying,_**

**_That I would lay forgotten,_**

**_Just like a old and useless toy._**

**_Why,_**

**_Why did he forget me?_**

**_He didn't speak to me,_**

**_Not even to say Hi,_**

**_Just passing me by,_**

**_Never noticing that something is wrong with me._**

**_That maybe I wanted to change,_**

**_Guessing what you think you hate about me._**

**_So I had decided a week after my first letter to you,_**

**_That I would change so much you would ask,_**

**_So that when you returned you would wonder,_**

**_What is wrong,_**

**_But it didn't work._**

**_You must hate me and our parents._**

**_----------_**

_Please no flames and please review. There shall be more chapters._


	2. Hogwarts

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View.

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

**---------------**

The minute we were on the train Sirius walked away from me and I do not know anyone really well on this train. Sure I know all of the pureblood names and faces, but it is still not the same. Someone wearing green oh must be Slytherin said to me with a smirk "Your brother is a stupid blood traitor."

He was mocking my brother and mocking me for Sirius being a so called blood traitor. I will not lose my cool and control. I stated flatly to him "Well you are clearly a moron. For one is he is not stupid, and he is not a blood traitor."

Then I smirked, but then added mockingly "Ever heard of keeping your friends close, but your foes closer. Ever heard of gathering information, blackmail, finding weaknesses, finding out everything first hand and using it against them. Well have you? Never ever say that about my older brother unless you have some hard cold facts. It can mean danger will occur if you say my brother is a blood traitor. After all I read a lot."

He yelled "You skinny little smartass! I'm a second year Slytherin! Respect me!"

I stated "Oh, Just one year ahead bet you do not read often. I'll be in Slytherin and the day I respect you... Will be never happen and don't hold your breath waiting for it."

He was stuttering with rage and I left him quietly after all I do not want to get into trouble. I found an area with no one in it, I changed into my uniform and then I opened up a book to read. Before I knew it the train arrived at Hogwarts and time for everyone to leave the train. I did not gasp in amazement like most of the other first years for I just smiled to myself. We were walked into the Great Hall and are names were being called.

"Black, Regulus."

I noticed the people around Sirius looked a bit 'like what on Earth'. I smiled bitterly for I know why then I put the hat on. Bet he didn't tell them that he had a younger brother and he must feel so ashamed.

**Hm where to sort you**

Quit messing around hat

**Bad mood. Now let's dig deeper. Oh very smart and still loyal to your brother? You are sly, good at acting, and good at controling yourself.**

Just sort me

**Oh be that way Regulus Black and straight to the point.**

The hat yelled out **"Slytherin!"**

No one clapped and I didn't care. I walked over to the Slytherin table and I only ate a little amount of food. So I'm in Slytherin just as I thought and I will not let them call Sirius a blood tratior. Yes, he may hate me, but he is still my brother. I still love him even though he is being cold to me. I can see he is having fun with his friends and laughing. Our parents told us to be called a blood tratior is the worst. I won't let anyone trash Sirius's or the family name. Soon it was time to go to the rooms and I changed into my sleep clothing. My roomates did not comment about being able to see some of my bones and I looked in the mirror.

I thought to myself 'Great now I'm too skinny. I look like death has warmed and Sirius didn't notice. I have to slowly gain my weight back and I'll mail order for some books on this subject. I can not rush it or else I'll get sick.'

In the morning time at breakfeast I only ate an apple and I saw my brother walk over. Maybe now he'll say something to me and maybe tell me what is wrong with me. However Sirius just grabbed my wrist, I mentally winced and I knew it would bruise. I saw his friends, the ones who took him away, and maybe the reason why he didn't write. I felt a little anger boiling up, but I bottled it up. At least Sirius finally noticed me and might talk to me.

Sirius didn't look at me, but stated "This is my younger brother Regulus. Regulus this is James Potter, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew."

A pure blood tratior, half blood, and another half blood. It didn't matter what kind of blood they happen to have to me. I dislike for the fact that they can talk, write, and be repiled to by my brother. Yeah I'm a pure blood, his brother, known him, and everything, but yet he hardly ever talks to me and he lives with me. I was jealous of them and I felt envy burning up. However I did not down right hate Sirius's friends and I notice my housemates were staring. Now I notice Sirius still has a grip on my wrist like I'm going to run away.

I stated flatly "Hello. Now can you let go of my wrist. I think I'm starting to bruise."

I muttered "You could have just told me to come along and I would have Sirius."

I walked away, glancing down at my wrist I noticed a forming of a bruise, and I just sighed.

I started to tell them "I had to say hello-"

Then the same second year from the train said to me smugly "See your brother is a blood tratior. Hah, look at his friends."

I smirked then calmly said to him in a mocking way "Ever heard of playing pretend? Ever heard of fake kindness, love, and friendship? Along with those big fake smiles, talking to whom you despie, but yet being oh so polite. Now then kindly shut your mouth."

The second year was flushed with anger, but then I went on to say "Oh, cool down sweetie. Your oh so scary and manly."

Of course the second year screamed "You bitch! Your mocking me!"

I stated "Oh, dear making a scene how shameful."

I was having a bit of fun with mocking the second year named Len McCoy even though I'm a first year. I noticed my brother looking at this table and I almost smiled for at least he notices.

I added "Oh and McCoy you are rather hotheaded. Darling maybe you are a lion instead of a snake?"

McCoy yelled quite loudly "Regulus Black I hate you!"

I repiled mockingly "Oh, Love you too. Heh, that temper will land you in some trouble."

McCoy tried to grab me, but I grabbed his arms then told him "Witnesses, witnesses everywhere, and you will be in trouble. For a note just for you, Muggle style fighting is a no no unless you lost or broke your wand."

The second years told McCoy it is not worth it and my year which is first year was impressed, but not openly of course. I was the last one to leave then Sirius's friend Lupin walked toward me. What could he want was my only thought.

Lupin told me "You look unhealthy. You should go to hospital wing."

Damnit all this Lupin I just met noticed what my own brother did not even noticed. I felt like yelling and crying at the same time. I just can't stand it and questions were going through my mind. Why did Lupin notice? Why did Sirius my own brother did not notice? I'm in a bad mood and I notice Lupin looking a bit under the weather.

I snapped "You look unhealthy too Lupin. Is it a crime?"

Lupin repiled "I can see your bones cle---"

I walked away quickly and started my way to class. The day seemed to fly bye quickly and it was time for dinner. I saw my brother making some kind of a joke, I remembered back when he told me jokes, and I would laugh. I wish I could go back to those times before Sirius went to hogwarts. Then I noticed the second year Snape was starting to change color and everyone else in Slytherin expect me. Must be the food since I did not have a bite of it for I did not feel hungry. Almost everyone was laughing, this must be the joke, and it is on Slytherin. I was not laughing not because it was on Slytherin, but because I was not told of the joke.

I saw Sirius and his friends plus many others smiling also laughing. No one noticed me not like it mattered to me. Snape and the other Slytherins were enraged at the color gold and scarlet. Then McCoy yelled "Hey, what about Regulus Black!"

I stated "I simply did not feel like eating for I do not feel good."

Then my brother decided to notice me and he cast a spell at me. Now I was in a pink dress and I did not feel rage. I turned it green and did not bother yelling. I simply walked away and some were stunned at my lack of outrage. Sirius's friends are the problem and they are the reason as to why he is like this now. I express what I feel when no one is around or it is to someone whom I trust. The hall was empty and the air was cold. I went to the window and did not wimper as the tears ran down. Why is my brother acting this way? What have I done? I remembered how Sirius use to be semi nice to the house elf, but then when he got back. He was no longer nice to the house elf. Am I like the house elf in that sense? Sirius have you abandoned me? NO NO NO, he would never ever do that to me!

I sighed then I muttered "Sirius, Would not ever abandon me."

I did not bother to wipe my face and I was back in my bed in Slytherin. I almost forgot to undo the spell, I knew Sirius knows how to change clothing into dresses after all we were taught spells by our parents. Of course without a wand and it was mainly reading/saying. My belly was growling and it did not matter to me as I went to sleep. I awoke early and as I was walking I saw Snape. I know Snape is a half blood after all I did research during the summer on all pure bloods and half bloods. Yes everyone expect me knows that Snape is in fact a half blood. I do not care for not everyone in Slytherin is a pure blood and the other houses assume Slytherin means it only has pure bloods.

I sat down at the great hall and Snape for unknown reasons decided to come over.

Severus Snape told me "I hate your brother."

I said to him "Yes, Along with almost everyone in Slytherin."

Snape asked me "Regulus Black do you hate your brother?"

I repiled calmly "No, but it seems he hates me."

Snape asked me "Why?"

I did not want to think about it, but the question 'Why' always appears in my mind. Also Snape seems not to have many people to chat with at all. On top of that who would believe Severus Snape?

I answered "Last year, I wrote to him often, but he never repiled or even wrote to me. During the summer time he writes letters to his friends almost every day, does not even talk to me or even notice me. I tried to gain his notice, but it failed. My brother seems to wish that he was from some other family. I know that mother yells, screams, and throws things. Why is it that he wishes to be away from me. I never yelled, scream, or hurt him. I was nice, covered for him, but yet it is not enough."

Snape was about to say something, but my brother showed up. Sirius scoffed at Snape and said to me "Regulus, Never knew you were so desprate to find friends. To think your are friends with a greasy haired git."

I snapped ""He is a good listener unlike you Sirius. You use to listen to me."

Sirius glared at me then asked "What?"

I couldn't stand having him glare at me and I did not like feeling hated. Sirius use to listen to me and have the answers.

I repiled calmly "Sirius, you are not good at hearing people out."

I noticed Sirius's friends coming over and I saw Snape sneering at them.

Sirius told me "You are such a--"

Potter asked "Sirius, what is the problem?"

I noticed Snape bringing out his wand, but I didn't take out my wand. Sirius answered Potter with 'Snape being alive', I felt a pang of pain for I think Sirius wished I was not ever born, and that I never existed.

I stated "Sometimes I wished I was never born, but guess what I was born."

I walked away and I knew they were confused expect maybe Snape.

**-With Sirius, Remus, James, Peter, and Snape-**

Sirius answered James by saying "Snape being alive."

Regulus stated "Sometimes I wished I was never born, but guess what I was born."

Regulus walked away, James raised an eyebrow then asked "What was that all about?"

Sirius rolled his eyes then repiled "Being a drama queen."

Remus started to say "I think--"

Sirius coughed then stated "Anyway who cares about that drama queen."

Snape was able to walk away before anyone noticed and left.

**-Back to Regulus-**

I decided to go to hospital wing for something to help with this dizzyness I'm feeling right now. Madam Pomfrey decided that I needed a check up or something like to find out what is wrong with me. Turns out I was underweight and I have to take potions every day for about a month. I went to class and it was quite dull. It was painfully easy and before I knew it I was sleeping. I had a nightmare and it was about Sirius leaving me to live somewhere else. I won't be left behind by myself and Sirius will willingly talk to me.

**_Sometimes I get these nightmares,_**

**_It's about you leaving,_**

**_It's about me being left behind,_**

**_You not caring,_**

**_I won't believe it._**

**_I want to believe,_**

**_One day you will talk to me,_**

**_That you will listen,_**

**_That you'll understand,_**

**_For I believe in you._**

-----

Please review and no flames. Thank You.


	3. Friends

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View.

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

**----**

I woke up and walked to the great hall. I sat down and then I noticed Severus Snape.

Snape stated "Your brother is not worth it."

I told Snape "Sirius is my only brother and he is worth it. He insults people that he does not like or people who offend him. Sirius just doesn't listen much now a days and he is more judging of people. He changed after coming to Hogwart. Now then do you have any brothers or sisters?"

I know he does not have any brothers or sisters, but I asked him because I wanted to get off the topic.

Snape repiled curtly "No."

Oh yeah family issues, his mother is a pure blood from the Prince family, and his father is a muggle. The result is conflicting issues and stuff of that nature.

I decided to say "McCoy is a bitch. Even though he is not a female dog."

Snape told me "He has an older brother and he is a third year."

I asked while I raised an eyebrow "What's his name?"

I rarely paid mind to McCoy expect when he decides to insult me, but I suppose I should gather information on him. I do know McCoy is a pure blood and a git. I have not thought about who was in his family, well with my research of pureblood only look at the parents blood lines. However with the half bloods I read more carefully and did my research and find things out.

Snape repiled "Sen McCoy."

I nodded and I was thinking of the Forbidden Forest. I wondered what was inside of it even though I know it only has plants and animals. Plants that could be used for potions and I know Snape likes potions. Even though I could just buy it, but I wonder why is it Forbidden. When one deals with potions there hair tends to get a little oily from the fumes.

I stated "Souds like Sin."

Snape was about to say something, but then Sirius showed up. Of course his friends were with him and I was half tempted to glare at his friends.

Sirius smirked and said to us "Two misfits talking."

I stated "I'm going now brother."

As I walked away Sirius yelled "Coward!"

I felt like yelling 'I do not want to fight with my brother', but I did not yell instead I walked to hospital wing to pick up the potion to drink it. Then off to classes and it was boring. However at dinner time Len McCoy and his brother sat across from Snape and I. His brother Sen sneered at me and I did not bother returning it.

Len McCoy sneered "You are friends with a grease ball."

I stated "Severus is good at potions while you are a failure. You decided to get your brother into this Len McCoy."

Len McCoy grinned then said to me "At least my brother is willing to fight with me unlike your sorry good for nothin---"

My face was tight and I hexed him soundly. His brother was about to get up, but I made him freeze. I grabbed Len's arm and whispered darkly "You shut your damn mouth about my brother. You son of a bitch."

I undid the hexes then Len yelled "Regulus Black you just can't see your brother doesn't give a da---"

I stated "You are not worth it McCoy."

I walked away and Snape decided to come along.

I asked Snape "Do you think I was a coward for walking away from Sirius?"

Snape repiled "No."

I told him "I just do not understand why Sirius wanted to start a fight. He is my brother and it is sort of funny how he broke his promise to me. My mother did, my father, and my brother. I remember my promise to Sirius, I was about five, and it was to not give up on him. Sirius had laughed, but then promised never to abandon me. I know he broke his promise about writing to me, but he won't break his promise to never abandon me. I won't believe it ever."

I cleched my fist and my finger nails broke the skin, but I didn't care as it was bleeding. I noticed the shape of crescent moon on my palm and a little amount of blood coming out for it.

Snape asked me "It is worth it? Do you believe it Regulus?"

I smiled then repiled "Yes I do Severus. I'll aways believe it in the end."

Severus did not mock me nor laugh. Sure I have people in my year admire me, but not one friend. Severus Snape is one whom I will consider a friend even though he despies my brother. I can understand because of all the pranks that Sirius and his friends pull. Besides he does not just despie my brother, but also his friends. My brother along his friends were walking toward us and I sighed while thinking 'Here we go again'.

Sirius snapped "Regulus, show me your wrist."

I asked "Why?"

I hopefully thought he had noticed. I can still see my bones a little, but the potion has been working.

Sirius repiled "Because Remus told me too. He said he could see your bon--"

I stated "Yes it is true. Recently I went to hospital wing to get a potion to cure my body. It started after you came back brother, but you were too busy to notice or even care."

I walked away while Sirius yelled "Regulus get back here!"

Severus was sneering at Sirius and I knew there would be a fight. Of course I turned back and walked to Severus.

I told Sirius "No need to yell. I was just a bit miff about how your friend noticed something that you failed to notice. The truth is I thought I was fat and another reasons."

I turned to Severus and muttered "I have to go now. Are you going too?"

We both walked away and now maybe Sirius will just think about it. Maybe he will willingly talk to me and will notice things without his friends pointing it out.

I told Severus "I really thought he had noticed, but his friend Lupin had told him. Talk about disappointment, but I won't give up."

I know Severus is friends with the muggle born Lily Evans for I can notice things. I do not insult the muggle borns by saying mudblood unless it is in front of Mother. My reasoning is I know for a fact they do not have mud in their blood. Besides it makes them more willing to rise up, to become powerfull, and more will power. There are some weak willed and weak pure bloods. I do not have issues with blood lines for it. To me anyone can become powerful, but it all depends on Will Power and Brains. Of course I do not voice my reasons, I would to my brother, but he never asked me.

I decided to tell Severus "It doesn't matter to me your friends with the muggle born Lily Evans. The others do not notice, but be warned in the future you will be faced with a choice. Not by me, but by the other Slytherins and her."

Severus nodded and stated to me "I know, but that will happen in the far future."

The future can seem far, but it is very close. I have until Sirius is out of school forever to get him to willing talk and listen to me.

**_The future seems so far away,_**

**_But it is coming and it will be there before you know it._**

**_I want to sort everything out before it is too late,_**

**_But you won't listen,_**

**_I do not want to force you to open your eyes,_**

**_I want you to notice the clues,_**

**_Not your friends._**

**_The very friends who took you away,_**

**_Changed you and caused you to break your promise to me._**

**_So please listen, see, and understand,_**

**_Before it is too late,_**

**_Before we are old,_**

**_Before we die._**

-----

Please review and no flames. Thank You.


	4. The weekend

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View.

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

**----**

It's been about a month nothing really had happened since that day. Sirius avoided me even when I was with Severus Snape. It was a rainy day outside, no classes today, and I was bored. Severus was with Lily Evans and talking somewhere away from the Slytherins. I decided to wear black sorts, a black short sleeve shirt, and black shoes with black socks. I walked outside and I sat by a tree. I let myself get soaked and I didn't care. I smiled lightly after all I like the rain no infact I love it. I remember when Sirius and I were young, parents were away, and it was raining. We had danced in the rain, got soaked, we laughed, and the house elf had cleaned up the water.

This time I'm alone, no dancing nor laughter, and no Sirius. I have been out here for hours and now I saw Sirius, he was laughing in the rain with his friends, and not noticing me. He must have forgotten and now I felt a little depressed, but at least he is happy. I saw Severus walking to me, Noticed Sirius and them stopped laughing.

Severus asked me "What are you doing out here in the rain?"

I repiled simply "Memory's."

Severus understood what I meant by Memory's and I saw them walking toward us.

Sirius asked "Snape what are you doing here? James, Remus, Peter, and I were having fun until you showed up."

Severus was about to answer, but I told Sirius "You know Sirius you didn't need to stop for one person. I certainly did not when other people showed up after I have been outside for hours. Sure I was not laughing, dancing, but thinking."

Sirius snapped "Shut up Regulus. It is none of your business."

Sirius was glaring at me and Severus. I always hated it when Sirius glares at me, but I have to say something for Severus is my friend.

I told him "Severus Snape is my friend. People happen to defend friends. Besides rain is for everyone."

I walked away, Severus was walking away too after glaring at them, and Sirius yelled "Coward!"

I stated to Severus "He always say that word. I do not want to spoil my memory of the rain."

Severus stated "I honestly do not understand why you say even though he is such a--"

I sneezed, but then I told Severus "I have to change out of these clothes. I had been out in the rain for hours and I'll more than likely will end up sick."

Severus looked a bit surpised that I had stayed out in the rain that long. I had known my brother would be in the rain sometime today and I was waiting. At least he was having fun and happy too. I hate it when my feelings overflow especially when I'm feeling depressed. I just wished Sirius asked me to play in the rain too, but maybe next time it will be different. I changed into warm clothes after I dried off and yet I still felt numb. I know Hogwarts have House elf's because at times they brought me food. Then Len McCoy showed up and laughed at me.

I raised an eyebrow then asked "What is so funny McCoy?"

Len McCoy answered "I saw you in the rain just sitting. Doing nothing at all and then--"

I faked a smile then told him "Yes and I was thinking about things because I have a brain, but at times I'm not too sure about you."

Len McCoy is easy to anger and it is wonderful to cure sadness. Yes this will be fun and I will win.

As I thought Len McCoy yelled "Black, I do have a brain!"

Then I repiled "Then why must you yell all the time or is it that your head is messed up."

After a while of this I was bored and Len McCoy stormed out at long last. I decided to read some books, ate some food that the House elf brought up, and went to sleep. Some people mistreat House elves, but I do not for after all they are loyal. Anything let it be human or non human that is loyal should not be mistreated by others. It happens to be some people do not understand that if pushed too far they will be more likely to help the one that is kind. If one were mean or mistreat a House Elf and afterwards tell it to go away then that person is a dummy.

I awoke early it was Sunday and no classes today. I changed into black shorts, a dark blue short sleeve shirt, black socks, and black shoes. I walked outside and I felt the chilly air. I like all weather, but when the rain shows up it is the best. I did not shiver even though one might dress warmly for example Severus. Yes Severus does not like the cold and always dress warmly. I watched as the sun came up and I smiled for the sun never disappoints. The reason is that it will always rise up and give us light not always warmth, but light. A hope for a new day and Severus is more then likely talking to Lily again, but I feel no evny about it. From what I heard from Severus she is kind, nice, and smart.

In about two hours I saw Lupin and he decided to walk toward me. Why is it Lupin? What does he want now.

Lupin told me "You said yesterday that you stayed outside for hours. Why?"

I felt like snapping for it was not my brother who had noticed. If he did then maybe he would remember the same memory.

I flatly said to him "Memory's and I was waiting for something to occur, but I was disappointed. Maybe next time and you can go since I answered your question."

I walked away and I was not not paying any mind. I bumped into my brother and Sirius was about to yell, but then grabbed my arm.

Sirius stated to me "You are freezing. Go inside."

I was happy that he noticed and I did as he told me too. At least he noticed and didn't yell. I smiled and went inside to read another book. Then after I was half way through the book Severus shows up. I was about to tell Severus, but he looked a bit depressed.

I asked "Lily?"

Severus repiled "Yes Lily is bit miffed right now. Someone called her a mudblood and I didn't do anything."

I stated "Severus just tell her that you are sorry. She'll understand, but remember she can take so much. Next time be a little more careful."

Severus nodded then left me and I returned to my book. Of course I was reading a spell book and soaking in the information for later uses in school/after school life. It was nightfall when I finished reading several books and time for bed. I went to sleep quickly and I was happy for Sirius had noticed plus maybe worried.

**_You noticed that I was cold, _**

**_You told me to go inside,_**

**_So you must of been worried._**

**_Full of hope over it,_**

**_Maybe you'll talk more next time,_**

**_Maybe you will smile,_**

**_Maybe you will laugh,_**

**_Maybe you will be happy to see me._**

**_I'm so happy,_**

**_I'm full of hope._**

**_One step closer,_**

**_To you caring,_**

**_To you listening,_**

**_To you understanding._**

-----------

Please review and no flames. Thank You.


	5. Disappointment

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View.

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

**---**

I awoke early and walked down to the great hall. I saw my brother and his friends waiting for something. I decided not to eat for I plan on eating food from the House Elves. I'm a first year, but I'm not dumb because I know that they are up to something. I was waiting for Severus, but then my brother sent a spell at me. I started to dance and then he cast another spell I was now in a girl uniform. I felt that hope die a little, but at least he notices me. So I had a small smile and I know no one else expect Severus will understand.

I did not yell nor curse my brother. I merely smiled, I was disappointed, but at least he cares enought to do somthing to me. Rather than avoiding me and being quiet. I undid the dancing charm. I walked out and Severus saw me.

I heard Severus mutter "Regulus you fool."

I smiled then told him ",But it is worth it. I won't give up on him. Now I have to undo this little charm on my clothing. Then go to class early."

Class was boring for I already knew it and I was able to cast it. I saw Sirius yelling at Severus about something like 'I don't bloody care! I hate my family! I'm not like them!' I walked over to Severus and told him 'Let's go'. I walked away quietly and I won't believe it. No I can't ever believe it, but yet my thoart felt weak.

I muttered "No, he was just annoyed. He didn't mean it."

Severus just looked at me then sighed, but he didn't say anything. I have emotions many of them, I try not to let them get to me, but in the end they win. I could taste the salt and I knew my eyes must be red, but I did not make a sound. Severus was guiding me to the Slytherin common room which is still empty.

I asked Severus quietly "Am I being a drama--"

Severus repiled "No. Also It is not a crime to have emotions."

I was disappointed in my brother, but it shall fade away. It could of been worse, he could of just said that he just hated me, and said my full name which is Regulus Arcturus Black.

**_Disappointment happens a lot,_**

**_ But then it fades away in time._**

**_Hope still alive and belief still hanging on,_**

**_Just can't hold on to the disappointments in life,_**

**_It would destory a person's will, spirit, and heart._**

-----

Please review and no flames. Thank You.


	6. After 1st year Summer time

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View.

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

**---**

I lost track of time from the moment Sirius had said those words and it was time to go back home. Another summer of Sirius paying more mind to his friends than to me. I faintly noticed when I went on the train, arrived on at the station, and the travel home. I went to bed as soon as I got home. When I awoke, I knew that I had to do something to keep my mind off it, I was allowed to go outside, and be out until 8:00PM. I told Mother that I from now on will be outside more and she repiled simply 'Just return at 8:00PM and don't get kidnapped.'

I nodded and went on my way. I had stated 'Knock a turn alley' and I was on my way. I wished that stuff was dark blue instead of green. Most assume Slytherins just love the color Green, no not true at all in some cases. I prefer blue to green, but Snape likes the color black and also green. I noticed an old witch with croocked teeth that are stained and with a strachy voice asked "Are you lost little boy?"

I raised an eyebrow then repiled simply "No, but I think you happen to be lady."

Yes that is how I handle this type of thing and I was not worried. I have my wand, I'm away from muggles, and there are plenty of adults. The reason why I'm here is to buy some old books and afterwards walk around then floo home. I do not believe there is such a thing as 'Dark' or 'Light' magic. It just depends on how the spell is used and reasoning. I went to the so called 'Dark book store', I made sure not to be ripped off, and managed to get some good deals. I carried them in a black bag and I smiled faintly. I looked at the broom sticks and thought to myself maybe I'll try out for Seeker.

I floo back home and I noticed my brother reading a letter. I sighed lightly, but I do not plan to give up. I decided to write to Severus since I remember telling him that I would write, but I have a feeling he won't reply quickly since Lily Evans lives close.

_Dear Severus,_

_Hope that you will a good summer. I know I will not have one and Sirius is still the same, but it is worse since he is not talking. I won't give up. Before you ask he is worth it._

_From Regulus_

I smiled as I handed the letter to my owl and I went upstairs to read. When ever Mother seems to be annoyed that is when I would talk to her. I told her 'For Sirius it must be tough to keep up this act and in the end it will be well worth the wait'. I wrote to Severus every single week and he made sure to reply. I was happy, but then Sirius got one of the letters from Severus and snapped at me "You writing to this annoying greasy git."

I repiled quietly "He is my friend. You write to your friends every single day. I write once a week."

Sirius rolled his eyes then told me "Shut up."

I walked away and the day until Hogwarts was getting near. Mother had bought the supply's needed and no need to rush. At least Sirius talked to me and I was glad. I mostly read books, Mother bought us brooms, and I couldn't wait to get to Hogwarts. This year will be better and Sirius will be like he use to be before Hogwarts.

**_Clinging onto Hope,_**

**_Never letting go of it,_**

**_Never losing sight of it._**

**_It will be better,_**

**_Things will change,_**

**_Things shall occur,_**

**_For better this year._**

-----

Please review and no flames. Thank You.


	7. Meeting Arty

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View.

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

**---**

Before I knew it, Time to go onto Hogwarts express, and I already knew Severus was going to sit by Lily Evans. I did not feel envy, but I was a bit annoyed. Of course Evans knew Severus first, but I felt a tad bit of envy. I noticed a boy with straw blond hair, brown eyes, and a little bit of freckles. It appears that he is a first year and I decided to talk to him.

I said to him politely "Hello, I'm Regulus Black."

He smiled then repiled "Hello, I'm Bartemius Crouch Jr."

I nodded then simply asked "Can I call you Arty?"

He told me "Sure, but if I can call you Reg or something along those lines. I do not like my name. I'm named after my father."

I repiled "Alright you can give me a nickname. Do you have any brothers or sisters?"

I already knew the answer was 'No', but I asked anyway. Then Arty had answered me then asked me the same question.

I decided to tell him "I have an older brother his name is Sirius and--"

I saw my brother walking in and he scuffed. Why does he always have to be insulting when I'm just sitting here. I made sure that my emotions are in order and I will remain like stone. He told me "Hah, Even Snape left you. Now you are stuck with--"

I stated flatly "Severus did not leave me. I'm not stuck with anyone and Arty here is my friend. Your friends must be waiting."

He laughed then turned away to walk to his friend. I told Arty "And that was my older brother Sirius."

Art told me "He is not nice."

I sighed then said to him quietly "He use to be before Hogwarts, but he had changed after returning."

Arty decided to tell me "He won't change back Reggy. A long time ago my father use to talk to me, but then after a few short years. He had changed, busy, busy, not noticing me, and working almost all the time."

I bit my lip then reply was ",But a brother is different than a father."

Arty said to me "I hope your brother will be nicer to you."

I could tell that Arty was not lying about what he had said. We talked, talked, and talked until we finally reached Hogwarts. Yes we even talked as we changed into our Hogwarts uniform. I hardly noticed that Severus was with Lily Evans and I can bare it since I have someone to talk with of course. Arty is a good listener and before he had to go with the other first years. He asked me 'Which house are you?'

I smiled then told him "Slytherin."

I couldn't wait to find out which house he will be sorted into and I hope it is in Slytherin. I noticed when Severus sat down next to me on the left right and I told him "Hello, Severus. How was your summer?"

I heard Arty's name being called and then the hat yelled "SLYTHERIN!"

I smiled and it appears Severus does not care either way about Arty. Arty sat down to my right and told me "Honestly it was torn between Ravenclaw and Slytherin. I choose Slytherin of course."

I nodded then said to Arty "This is Severus Snape and Severus this is--"

Arty stated flatly "Bartemius Crouch Jr.

Severus coldly said to him "Hello, Bartemius."

Then he walked away to sit by himself and I was a little confused. I asked "What just happened?"

Arty told me "Appears he is a little upset that you have another friend."

I sighed then muttered "Oh well. He has other friends too."

The sorting was over and food was on the table, but I didn't feel hunger. I don't want Severus to hate me, but he has other friends. It must of been he left a little left out, but that will change. I noticed my brother he was laughing with his friends and Arty told me 'Forget about him.'

I sighed, but then repiled "I can't Arty. I want to fix things up, I don't know what I did wrong, but I'll try my best."

Then my brother appeared before me and snickered. He said "Hah, Snape leaves you. You are desprate and I know that your boring since you read a lot. Now your friends with a first year even though your a second year. First years are annoying and total brats. Also I happen to hat--"

Arty appeared to be getting a bit ticked while I was calm. Then Arty snapped "Get lost you bloody git."

Sirius sneered "Got some guts for a first year Slytherin."

I sliently stood up and told Sirius "You should go back to your friends before your missed brother."

I walked away and Arty followed me. Arty stated "He shouldn't treat you like that Reggy."

I told Arty "It's alright, but he insulted you too."

We walked to the Slytherin common room and then I told him "You best watch out he hates Slytherins."

I know my brother hates Slytherins, he believes that it means that you'll become a dark wizard/witch, but it is not always true. Sometimes I wished I was not in Slytherin so that my brother would care about me again and everything would be alright.

**_Sometimes I wish I was something else,_**

**_So that you'll care again._**

**_I would be willing to change everythig about me,_**

**_If you would care again._**

**_Can't you see that I'm trying so hard,_**

**_That I'm falling down,_**

**_Over and over again._**

**_Trying to please you,_**

**_Trying to make you see,_**

**_That I need you._**

**_Won't you turn and see me,_**

**_Trying so much and hard,_**

**_That I'm crying and screaming,_**

**_Being so damn emotional,_**

**_That it hurts me greatly._**

**_Won't you just treat me like your friends,_**

**_You look so happy when your with them,_**

**_It pains me that I can't make you happy._**

**_However I'm glad that you are happy,_**

**_But I wish that you could be just as happy,_**

**_With me._**

-----

Please review and no flames. Thank You.


	8. Rain

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View.

Thank you for reviewing!

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

**---**

I woke up early and headed to the great hall to eat some food. I noticed Arty walking to me and he waved at me. Of course I waved back since it is polite and he is my friend. My brother and his friends are not here yet. Arty seemed to look thoughtful and I ate some bacon along with some toast. Then Arty told me "I talked with the head of Slytherin and he said that it is possible for me to skip up a year, but it all depends on how much work I put in."

I was nosy and ask why he wanted to skip up a year. Instead I smiled and said to him "I wish you luck. To be honest I could of skipped up a year, but my brother..."

I couldn't finish my sentence of ,but my brother might of more openly said that he hated me and so on. I wouldn't be able to bare it and I would be more unhappy. I would see him with his friends more often. I saw Severus arriving and he decided to sit across from me. Arty was on my right hand side and Severus right across from me.

I asked Severus "How was your day yestarday?"

Severus repiled simply "It was alright."

Then I saw my brother arrive and his friends. My brother was laughing with them and I wondered what it was about. My mind wandered off a little, but then Arty poked my wrist lightly. Arty told me "Classes will be starting in eight minutes."

I said to Arty "Thank you."

I left to go to my first class and of course the classes were dull since I already know about it. I plan on trying out for seeker and maybe I'll get on the team. After classes I noticed that it was raining and I plan to go outside after I put up my stuff. I walked to Slytherin area, put away my stuff, and walked out of there. I knew Severus was with Lily Evans again and it did not bother me since he is happy. I smiled and walked out into the rain. I noticed Arty walking, but then he stopped. He walked to me and asked "Reggy, What are you doing out here in the rain?"

I told Arty "I love the rain, the smell, feel, and taste of it. The rain brings me back memory's. I wonder will there be a down pour."

Arty was not annoyed or looked at me as if I was insane. Instead he smiled then stated simply "It is time to make new memory's."

I asked while having a raised eyebrow "With what?"

Arty laughed then repiled "More like with whom and how."

Arty had his hands cupped collecting the rain water and tried to toss it at me. I laughed and I started collecting the rain too. I managed to get him, he laughed then he decided to play dirty. Arty scopped some mud up and tossed it me. I was having fun and so was Arty. I had told him about the helpful House Elves at Hogwarts and he told me that he won't tell anyone else about how useful that they can be at times. In the end we were gasping for air after running and laughing. No one noticed for we were a little bit away from the main area and hardly anyone likes the so called gloomy rain. The rain started to turn into a down pour and it washed away the mud.

I told Arty "The rain washes everything away. It is amazing and I love the sounds of thunder. How the lightning lights up the whole sky and the roaring winds that sometimes occur. "

Atry smiled then said to me "You must really love the rain. However we should go back inside before we catch a cold."

I repiled "Alright. Hopefully it will rain again."

Arty stated "And I'll be there in the rain with you."

We headed back, soaking wet, and too lazy to use the drying spell. Besides it is just water and it dries without any stains. Funny thing is when I was out in the rain with Arty I didn't think of my brother at all times. Severus waited until Arty was out of sight when he walked to me.

Severus told me "You will one of these days catch a bad cold. Being out there in the rain and letting yourself get soaked to the bones."

I stated quietly "It makes me feel wonderful and I love the rain. Besides it wasn't that long."

Severus sighed , but then stated "Dinner is over Regulus."

I muttered "Sorry, Severus. Anyway how is your friend Lily Evans?"

Severus repiled "She is alright, but someone called her a mudblood."

I stated "It is a just a name. Not like it is a hex or someone calling her a bitch."

Severus sighed and told me ",But to her it is worse I suppose."

I nodded then repiled "I'm feeling a bit tired. I'm going to sleep and Severus don't worry."

I was waiting for Sirius in the rain, but then Arty shows up. My mind was taken away from my brother and now I felt a bit guilty. However I know that I for once had fun in the rain without my brother and Arty enjoyed it too. Severus does not play in the rain because I suppose he does not love it. Rain brings water to plants and a promise of a new day. The rain wipes away stains and sometimes there is a rainbow. The rainbow looks pretty, but I love the rain more.

**_I take my mind off of you,_**

**_Not forever._**

**_Just enjoying the rain,_**

**_Adding new memory's and laughter to be remembered._**

**_I love the rain,_**

**_I'm not lonely anymore,_**

**_I still wait for you,_**

**_But someone decided to be there as I wait._**

**_The wait was not lonely,_**

**_For there was someone with me._**

**_I wonder next time will you be there too?_**

**_I hope you will be,_**

**_It would be so much fun,_**

**_Just like how it was before you changed._**

-----

Please review and no flames. Thank You.


	9. To wait

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View.

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

**---**

I woke up early once again, but this time I found Arty waiting for me in the common room. I smiled and then Arty told me "I was waiting for three minutes."

I nodded then said to him "At least it wasn't for hours."

I would wait hours and forever for someone who I care about for they would be worth it. I know my brother would not wait forever for someone because he can be impatient or maybe he is only like that with me. I just can't take my mind off of it, I won't believe that it is hopeless, and besides I'm quite patient. Potter is quite annoying, I notice that he likes Lily Evans, and maybe that is one of the reasons why they hate each other. Pettigrew is down right sad, shadowed by his friends, and trying to fit in. I do not pity Pettigrew for he brought that upoun himself and besides a person can always become stronger if motived. Lupin notices things, I do not like it for I want my brother to notice, and I don't like feeling my brother ignores me. It's pretty sad, but it's alright with me when he pranks me, or taunts me. After all he is there and not ignoring me. After all ignoring someone is the worst thing to do to a person.

Arty asked me in a wonder type of voice "Who would wait for hours for someone?"

I repiled "I would wait for hours. I waited for hours for my brother to show up, but when he did show up... He did not notice me instead he played with his friends without me. I would wait for you, Severus, and my brother."

Arty grabbed my arm not harshly like Sirius, he looked serious, and told me "I would not make you wait that long for I will be there."

People seem to like or feel the need to man handle me. At least Arty's grab is not painful and I half wonder why Sirius had grabbed me so harshly. Sirius really can't control his strength and maybe was caught in the moment or something similar. Arty looks so serious and he is eleven, but then again I was and still am quite emotional unlike some of my classmates. Maybe it was how I grew up or I simply think a bat. Thinking is not a bad thing, but it can make one space out a little bit and be free.

I repiled simply "Thanks Arty. It is time to eat before everyone gets up and it would be annoying to get food."

Arty ungrabbed my arm and muttered "Of course Reggy."

We walked to the great hall then I saw Len McCoy. I muttered to myself mockingly "Oh goody."

Len McCoy is an annoying and unbareable git. However his older brother Sen is more unbareable. I told Arty flatly "That git over there is Len McCoy."

McCoy mocking said to me "Oh, Blackie is with an ickie first year."

I was not in the mood, but Arty is not ickie. I snapped at McCoy "You were a first year last year too. Wait until you are a third year, but then again it would still sound stupid. The word ickie is unmature and used by an annoying. Hah, keep on using it McCoy."

McCoy snarled "Shut up blackie. At least my brother doesn't bloody ha--"

I really can't stand Len McCoy, he is just so annoying, and keeps on bringing up brothers. Sirius does not hate me, no he can't, and I do not believe it. McCoy is such a liar and I saw Arty glaring at McCoy. I best do something before Arty hexes McCoy not like it is a bad thing, but I don't want to risk him getting into trouble before he can try skipping up a year.

I stated flatly "Shut up. You know nothing sweetie."

McCoy shouted "No, I have you know that your brother had said he hat--"

I sneered "I don't believe it, I won't ever, and go away before I lose control of my damn temper."

Yes the Black family are also known for there tempers, but I manage to keep mine under control.

McCoy told me flatly "You are blind Blackie, you are in denia---"

I hexed McCoy quickly with the dancing charm and I told him false sweetness "McCoy mind your own damn business for you are not my friend. I dislike you and you hate me. So keep my brother out of it. Got it?"

McCoy yelled "Alright fine damnit all!"

I undid the charm and smiled. I told McCoy flatly "Now then go on eating like before McCoy. I'll be taking my leave from your words."

I sat far away from McCoy and Arty followed me. Afterwards Arty and I talked about all kinds of things. I saw Severus and he sat across from me. I noticed that Arty and Severus did not talk to each other, but I didn't ask. Classes were dull and I know I'm doing great in them. I really hoped it would rain and then I could wait. I put my stuff up then I heard the rain. I smiled and I started my way out of Slytherin traveling outside. I was about to sit by the tree, but then Arty showed up looking a bit tired. Did he run here? Is he not feeling good? Is he alright?

I decided to ask Arty "Are you alright Arty?"

Arty grinned at me and then repiled "I'm alright Reggy. I just ran here from all the way on the other side of the school."

He ran all that way and maybe it is because he just felt like burning off some anger. I asked him "Are you feeling angry?"

Arty laughed and I wonder why he had laughed. Maybe he ran because he was happy or simply because he felt like it. Arty repiled "Sorry, but I'm not angry at all. Think there will be thunder?"

Soon we were talking about all kinds of things and Arty's father. Arty had told me 'My Father is always busy and he hardly ever stops to even talk. I just hate it and Mother doesn't do anything. It's like I'm alone most of the time and there is no one around my own age there. I just read, eat, and sleep.'

I decided to tell Arty "Well, Arty you can always write to me. I'll always reply and you could even write every day. Hmm are you allowed outside?"

Art stated "Yes, Until 6:30PM."

I smiled and then asked "Allowed at Diagon Alley by yourself?"

Arty nodded and then asked me "What about you?"

I laughed and then told me "I can stay out until 8:00PM and of course I'm allowed at Diagon Alley by myself."

Arty looked a bit stunned at the time and I added "I have to make sure to be careful after dark."

Arty smiled then told me "Reggy, Your amazing."

First time someone called me amazing and I was happy. I said to him "Thank you. Your amazing too."

The rain has stopped and a rainbow appears.

**_I would wait forever for you,_**

**_Waiting patiently,_**

**_Knowing that you'll arrive._**

**_I smile to myself,_**

**_Thinking about you,_**

**_What you'll do when you arrive._**

**_I would wait,_**

**_Seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years,_**

**_And of course forever._**

**_It will be worth it,_**

**_My believing in you will pay off,_**

**_I just can't wait until you come to me._**

**_I think I would be very happy,_**

**_I would ask you happily, not bitterly _**

**_What took so long?_**

-----

Please review and no flames. Thank You.


	10. Worst Day Ever

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View. Trying to login in has been evil.

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

**---**

I had of the days and I notice Severus waiting in the common room and I waved at him. A little habit I picked up from Arty and I walked toward him.

Severus told me "Ah, Seems you have picked up the habit of waving."

Arty almost always waves and it is quite easy to pick up plus lot's of other people do it too. Plus it gains a person's notice.

I stated to Severus "Yes, and I noticed it seems to bring notice. Maybe I should try waving at my bro--"

Severus asked me "Remember Regulus I don't like him?"

I sort of forget that Severus doesn't like my brother at all for in fact he quite despises him. Yes it would be for the best to steer away from that topic and go to a better one.

I replied "Okay. How is Lily Evans?"

I had noticed before that Lily Evans is hanging out more with her other friends which are girls. Yes it seems that some girls are in a pack, but some are left behind like abandoned toys long forgotten. I do not feel pity for them after all no one honestly likes pity, but maybe it is just me or a phase in life for me. Damn sometimes I think too much and I better pay mind to Severus because I think he is ready to speak now.

Severus sighs then told me "She has been busy and hanging out more with her other friends. The ones that do not really like me at all."

I decided that I have to change the subject and I had an idea.

I told Severus "I have a cousin her name is Bellatrix and she hates being called Trix. She is older than me and likes to taunt people with that baby talk. In order to prove her point about that person being dumb and that person can only understand baby talk."

I really think it was funny when I was at my cousin's house and it was when I was about seven. Bellatrix was mocking a guy that she had just dumped and used baby talk. She had him in tears and he was begging her not to dump him. Bellatrix is about ten years older than me and born in 1951, but she does not tell her age for she tends to like them guessing. If they guess too low or high there doomed and no one ever asks or guesses again.

Severus smirked than said to me "No offense, but that sounds dumb for others might assume that she can only talk in baby talk."

I laughed then replied "Of course she doesn't always do that to people only to ones that she happens to hate."

Bellatrix happens to be fond of using big words and likes confusing people. I have heard her practiced hysterical laughter and I have always wanted to try that randomly, but then that would not be like Slytherin. Of course it might grab Sirius's notice and he would look at me again even if he thinks I had gone loony.

I told Severus "Say, Severus listen to this laugh."

I started laughing hysterically, I couldn't stop, and I had tears down my face. Then I managed to calm myself then I giggled when I saw Severus's face.

Severus replied "You sounded like you were about to be taken away to Azkaban or about to be thrown into a loony bin."

I told him after I smiled "Bellatrix's hysterical laughter was awesome."

Then I saw Arty walking toward me and stated to me "Reggie, cool laughter."

At least someone thought it was cool and that is all that mattered. Severus's hair is a little oily due to liking brewing potions. Next time I should tell him to pull his hair back instead of exposing his hair to the fumes of the potion. Potions can damage hair it can be fixed, but it worsens over time. I better reply before Arty thinks that what he had said was an insult.

I grinned then replied "You ought to try it Arty. It is quite fun, but make sure no one else hears it unless you want to be noticed or want to be dramatic."

Severus told me "I have to go now. I promised Lily I would meet her."

I understood that Severus needs Lily Evans and that he loves her a lot. Everyone needs to be or feel loved, but to me Friendship is forever. Love could last forever and be powerful, but sometimes it decays like a disease.

I nodded and said to him "Best to go now Severus. No one likes a promise to be broken."

Sometimes one too many promises broken can throw someone off and make them feel heartbroken. Don't make promises you can't keep or else it will hurt that person and of course yourself.

Arty smiled at me and told me "I hope it rains."

I told Arty about my plan and also that I will be secretly watching my brother more to discover who he talks to more in order to become more like that certain person. Arty decided to help me and it was best to have more eyes in order to see it all. I take some mental notes to myself, I know he talks the most with his friends Potter, Lupin, and Pettigrew, but I do not want to like them. Then I see him talking friendly with the girls, not caring what house they are from, and smiling. I notice he pays more notice to blond hair blue eyed slim girls and I smiled to myself for I had a plan, but won't be put into action until next year. After all I'm a second year student and I want to be a little taller. I plan to look into spells that are not permanent and buying things. Arty looked at me and I decided that I'll tell him first since he helped me a little with noticing things. On how my brother likes girls who can talk to him without stuttering and other minor things.

I grinned then whispered to Arty "I have a plan, next year is third year, and then I can go on trips. I plan to look like a girl, act like one too, and be able to talk to my brother normally. Expect I would not tell him it is me after all he doesn't like me for some reason."

Arty smiled then replied "A brilliant idea, but how Reggie."

I told him how I was going to sort everything out during the summer and that he could help me. I already knew Severus would be unable and be hanging out with Lily Evans. After a while we turned to watching how girls walked, the speech pattern, and how they acted. The many types of girls, but I wondered which type my brother talked to more. Of course I decided to tell Severus about my plan of looking like a girl, he flipped out a little and okay I lied he lectured me plenty.

Severus told me 'You are going to confuse yourself', 'It is bloody loony.', 'Have you gone crazy?', 'You will become a cross dresser' and then I had asked 'What is a cross dresser?'. Of course he replied 'Never mind. You will become confused and besides why dress like a girl.'

I told Severus "Sirius, Likes talking to girls besides I don't want to be like his friends. I'm not going to tell Sirius it is me and maybe my brother wanted a sister."

Severus looked at me, shook his head then stated flatly "You do not understand why he talks to the girls."

I do not understand what Severus is trying to say, he is sometimes like a teacher, and he is making things difficult to figure out. I just want his opinion, his answer, but he leaves me wondering at times. Even leaving me questioning myself and wondering if I should rethink it, but it won't work this time for I know the answer right away after watching my brother.

I told Severus "He likes them."

Yes he likes them for he talks to them and friendly. He doesn't hate them at all.

Severus replied "I give up Regulus. I wish you luck with your idea and hopefully it will not turn up how I think it will turn up."

I decided to not ask Severus how he thinks it will turn up andbesides Arty will be helping me. The whole hysterical laughter can wait for I have an idea that will take thought plus I want time with friends rather than being in hospital wing getting asked questions. However I have heard that crazy person get cookies, but then again it might have been a lie that my cousin Bellatrix had told me. We were walking to go outside and no there was no rain. Only large, white, and friendly looking clouds plus it was sunny out.

Instead I told Severus "Come to the dark side we have wonderful cookies."

Severus stated dully "By that you meant insanity."

Sometimes he makes it sound more like a statement than a question and I have to learn that trick. Then I noticed Len and Sen McCoy walking toward us. Len is a third year and Sen is a fourth year. Severus is a third year and I'm a second year.

Len said to me mockingly "Blackie, where's your stalking icky first year."

I replied sharply "Well, Darling he is not stalking unlike you baby doll."

Sen sneered at me "You little brat, your calling my brother pet names, and---"

I was ticked, but highly amused right now. I smirked and replied "Sorry, Honey thought you could give me one since you are older, and pretty darn creative. I guess I was wrong about you."

Sen was flushed in the face and looking quite red like an apple. Len was glaring at me and Severus was just watching since he knew that I did not need help. Bet Severus was wishing that he had some snacks while watching this mini little drama. I might as well spice it up a bit and be bad. I have been bored and needed an outlet plus no one is outside right now expect for us for some unknown reason. Might be because it is lunch time right now and feeling lazy too. I have watched how people interact and all sorts of things since hardly anyone notices me at times.

I twirled my black hair which was straight down to my shoulders and then told Sen ", But you know that's what I like about you. You're quite easy and not feisty unlike your little brother Len. Or as I call him LION."

Len yelled "You little bitty lying bitch!"

I laughed hysterically and then replied "See he is very feisty unlike your cool as a clam shell. I would call you BUNNY if only you were my age or a third year. So I will call you RABBIT. Lions eat rabbits."

Len did not comment, but just stared at me as if I was loony. Sen was still red and looking angry.

Sen yelled "Alright, I got some pet names for you!"

I smirked at him and I was mocking him. I told him mockingly "Oh, but you mustn't yell my big Rabbit."

Len walked away scowling and Severus was leaving now. Sen had calmed down and smirked at me. He told me "You are just a second year and bet you never been kissed."

I replied "So what Sen McCoy. I don't see your blo-"

Sen smirked at me in a malicious way and told me "You are all talk sweetie."

What did he mean by 'All talk' I use hexes too and Sen McCoy is acting a bit different.

I glared at me and stated flatly "I don't get it McCoy."

Sen McCoy smirked, he walked toward me, and I remember I left my wand behind. Why of all days did I forget my wand and what is with him? He was getting closer, I notice the height different, and what is with him. I was in a corner and he grinned widely for some unknown reason. Now what will I do without appearing to be weak and fearful. I notice that he has dark blue eyes and shoulder length blond hair.

Sen McCoy whispered softly "I'm going to make you feel fear, I'm going to make you remember not to mess with us McCoy's, but most of all I'm going to have fun. I won't be beating you up Sweetie. Can't let that doll like face scar."

I was not happy, still not understanding his bloody point, and if he is not going to beat me up then is he going to torture me with that damn minty breath. I really hate mint and I prefer Strawberries. Not one of my best days and Sen McCoy is being odd, but odder than normal. I feel his bruising grip on my wrists and I wished Severus was here. I wished my brother was here than maybe he would help me. I hate waiting and I wondered what Sen McCoy is planning to do if not beating me up.

I sneered "Then what are you going to do Mister Minty Breath Of Doom."

He grinned maliciously and then whispered "Oh, You'll find out."

I was growing bored and McCoy is still being a mystery about it. Plus he is being such a creep and my legs hurt. Also I feel an ice cold shiver up my spin and I do not like it.

I snarled "Just get it bloody over with whatever you are going to do moron."

I did not expect him to get closer, I remembered my cousin Bellatrix kissing someone, and they were really close. I decided to scream loudly and he still didn't back away taking his time. However I was in luck for someone grabbed McCoy and punched him. I let out a sigh of relief and note to self never be alone with that moron without having a wand. I noticed that it was Potter who punched him and then saw Lupin. McCoy was knocked out and I hope he stayed like that for a while until I can get my wand. Then I could hex him into bloody next week and he would suffer. I was surprised and disappointed it was not Sirius, but I can't be too picky. I was happy that moron didn't kiss me and I could jump for joy. What do I say? I'm not ungrateful and all that even though I dislike them for taking Sirius away. Why did they help me?

I said to Potter "Thank You. Next time I won't forget my wand. Didn't think McCoy would do whatever he was thinking of doing at the time.  
Said something about not beating me up and he is just plum insane. He was going to torture me with his minty breath or something I don't  
know the details. I really really hate mints now before I just hated them. And now I'm rambling on and on. Uh Thank You and Bye."

It was awkward and Potter was not making fun, but then again he usually saves it for Severus. I know that I looked pitiful with my robes messed up and my hair messy. Also I saw that awful bruise on each wrist and sighed unhappily.

Potter told me "Your welcome and you are Sirius's little brother. The way he talks about you I thought you would be some ungr--"

Lupin said to me "Be more careful."

I nodded and then I walked away. I was confused and then I saw Severus. I told him about Sen McCoy's odd words, poison minty breath, whispers, getting closer, and about the near miss. Then also told about Potter and Lupin. I showed Severus my bruised wrists and he looked pretty ticked off. Severus was muttering angrily something about making Sen McCoy pay and I decided it was best not to tell Arty. Sen McCoy was quiet for the rest of the year and I wondered why, but it was a good thing. Arty didn't know for I didn't tell him since he was busy doing a lot of work in order to be skipped up to third year. It was pretty quiet for the rest of my second year, I found out that Lupin was a werewolf, but I didn't tell anyone. After all I'm not one to tell others secrets besides he didn't told anyone about what happened expect for maybe my brother, but that would be okay. Before I knew it, the time to head back home has arrived, and time for my plan to be planned out completely.

_-Third Power review of that day-  
_

_Sen McCoy was ticked off at Regulus Black that annoying and pretty second year. Not to metion the emotions he feel and he didn't like it, but could help it. So Sen decided to try to scare Regulus after his brother Len had left and that greasey haired Snape. His idea was to make Regulus beg and to kiss him, but he took his time. Sen had found it funny that Regulus didn't understand and he tried to make him understand, but it didn't work. He grinned at Regulus disarray robes, messy hair, and decided to make his move slowly. Regulus screamed loudly and Sen didn't care.  
_

_James Potter and Remus Lupin heard a scream, quickly ran towards it, and saw Sirius's brother Regulus pressed against a corner. Sen McCoy's hands gripping Regulus wrists, James decided to help, and he decked Sen McCoy.  
_

_Regulus Black seemed confused and shocked. James and Remus were smiling at Regulus's ramblings. Afterwards they told Sirius and he had told them 'I may hate my little brother, but that doesn't mean I would wish this on him. '  
_

_Sen McCoy was not happy and was plotting, but then the threats came in. The threats made by Potter, Lupin, and Sirius Black. Plus of course that greasey haired Snape and he is good at potions. Sen McCoy decided not to risk it this year and be sneakier in the future. Of course Len McCoy was left out of the loop since his brother didn't want to tell him._

- Regulus Black View-

I smiled as I walked onto Hogwarts express and read a book. Then before I knew it time to get off of the train and I was happy. My brother was not happy and looking a bit depressed.

**The plans I make,  
They won't fail,  
You'll see me.  
You won't know it is me,  
You'll talk to me,  
You'll notice me,  
You'll be friendly.  
**----  
Please review and no flames. Thank You and reviews makes me feel happy plus knowing that there are people reading it. Hopefully wanting more of it.


	11. After 2nd year Summer time

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View.

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

**---**

I was busy with my plan of looking like a girl and all the minor details. Sirius was still busy writing lettters and up in his room. I wrote to Arty to meet me at 5:00PM today at the book store in Diagon alley. To skip over the boring details it was simple, I had the coins exchanged to muggle money, Arty and I went to the muggle stores. Mainly due to the reason of many knowing I have no sister and besides I thought it would be amusing. Arty was a bit pouty since he hardly knows anything about muggles while I know what the muggle coins happen to be worth. I even picked up some muggle fairy tale books desite Arty saying 'Waste of money' and I simply repiled in a question that sounded like a statement 'I wonder what the muggles think of wizards and witch's without asking them myself for that would be a waste of time.'

I let Arty pick out the clothing since I was a bit too lazy to decided and besides it doesn't matter. I picked out a blond wig, make up, and the high heels. A book on how to match skin tone, hair, and eyes to have the correct make up on. After all of this we went back to Diagon Alley and bought some Ice Cream. I bought a simple strawberry flavored Ice Cream while Arty had Blueberry Ice Cream. In truth I have been studying up on muggles, but no one knows not even Mother. If she knew then she would flip, but then I would tell her it is best to know more on ones foe than to be caught unaware.

Soon it was time for us to go back to our own home and I wrote to Severus. The days went on and I wrote to Arty to meet up with me in Diagon Alley near the Ice Cream place. I arrived there on time and I saw Arty waiting. I walked over to him and told him 'Arty, Now we can go to my house.' Of course Arty asked me 'Why didn't you just tell me the name of it?'

I told Arty flatly "Simple, Arty. It is because my Mother decided for the only way for non-blood related people to enter would be with a blood member of the black family. She decided it..I honestly forget when she placed it into working action."

I decided no to add that it doesn't apply to House Elves and Mother would be upset if I told anyone about that loop hole in our system. So we went to my house, I showed Arty my room, and it happens to be very tidy. I smirked at Arty then told him of Snow White which happens to be a muggle fairy tale and in the end Arty asked 'How do you know of muggle fairy tales?'

I repiled to him "Remember I bought the book plus I have been studying them. To see if they believe in magic and I found hardly any muggle believes in it expect the kids. Rather funny Arty? Muggles totally clueless and helpless. I pefer to think of it as tragic and rather sad for those muggles see nothing expect what they believe to be normal. My cousin Bellatrix would say normal can be insainty in itself expect hardly anyone wants to see the truth of it."

Afterwards Arty was quiet then told me on how I could be better at dressing as a girl yet study muggles at the same time by dressing as the female characters in the muggle fairy tales. Arty took photo's and of course I kept them. In the end I put all of them in a scrap book labeled 'Regulus A Black' and cast the perment sticking charm on the back of each photo which I know by heart since Mother often used it. At the start I had half thought of selling the photo's to muggles, but Arty shot it down by saying 'Reggy, Those scum don't deserve to see those photo's'. I of course shrugged and told him 'Then they won't be sold at all due to the fact the wizarding world might discover it is me dressing as female characters in muggle fairy tales and that wouldn't be good.'

I put the scrap book up and Arty told me "Reggy, I do not like muggles."

I repiled "Arty, Just pay no mind and ignore them."

Before I knew it there was only one week until Hogwarts and one last trip to the muggle store. I decided to be daring and be there at 7:00PM of course Arty went too. However afterwards a young male muggle was openingly staring at me as if he wanted to eat me alive or something. We walked away, that muggle was following us, and I just ignored him. It did not work for he decided to grab me and whispered "Hey, Sweet heart want to--"

I managed to get that muggle on the ground and Arty was looking shocked. My hand was that muggle throat, but then flipped himself on me and grinned. That muggle had the nerve to say "So pretty thing, playing hard to ge--"

Arty still looking shocked, I reisted the urge to sigh and roll my eyes. I'm not thrilled at being under someone and even less for it is a muggle that might or might not be someone who eats human flesh. However I'm smart for I pushed my leg up and resulted in that muggle whimpering in pain. I got up, shoved him fully on the ground, and for good measure kicked him again. I grabbed the gapping Arty and we walked away.

Arty was rambling on how 'Muggles are flithy, a danger, I really bloody hate them.' Of course I told Arty on how I can defend myself unarmed and of course he asked 'How and Why'. I decided to tell him about stupid Sen McCoy and Arty seemed to become more pissed off. Now Arty was rambling on how Sen McCoy is a disgrace to wizards and how he hates him. I ignored the rambling and thought about researching on Muggles who eat human flesh. Arty seemed to be quite upset over the whole matter and a bit worried.

I stated to Arty "I can take care of myself. However next time you can do something about it."

Sirius was still busy and I was still researching about all kind of things. Before I knew it, time for Hogwart Express, and for another year. I smiled to my self and thought ''This year shall be different'.

**_I would change everything,_**

**_I would wear anything,_**

**_In order for you to talk to me._**

**_I will wear make up,_**

**_Sound like a girl,_**

**_Wear skirts, dresses, and even frills,_**

**_Just for you._**

**_Learn about muggle things,_**

**_So I could talk with you,_**

**_I know you like unknown things,_**

**_At times it could be deadly._**

**_Please I beg of you, _**

**_Talk with me,_**

**_I'll wait for you._**

**_My friends think your not worth it,_**

**_I know you hate the family,_**

**_But I believe in you._**

**_So much that it pains me,_**

**_I have tried to gain your notice,_**

**_But you turn blind eye to it._**

----  
Please review and no flames. Thank You and reviews makes me feel happy plus knowing that there are people reading it. Hopefully wanting more of it.


	12. Start of 3rd year and the word Mudblood

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View.

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

**---**

At long last I'm back at Hogwarts for now I can put my plan into action soon. The train ride here was alright and now Arty is in my year. Severus is in his 4th year while Arty and I are in our 3rd year. Sirius of course had ignored me during the summer and on the train ride to Hogwarts. He did not even bother to talk or even say Hi or wave or anything due to the fact Sirius was too wrapped up with his best friends. I hated being ignored, but I also hate it a lot when he yells at me. It makes me want to cry, but I try to be strong in front of Sirius and later when I'm alone I cry my heart out.

At the sorting of the other first years I was quiet and I wonder what would have happened if I wasn't sorted into Slytherin. I knew the answer, Mother and Father would be furious at the thought, and I figured it would more than likely wouldn't have mattered much to Sirius. I had to be Slytherin, I have to be perfect so that Mother and Father wouldn't be upset as much with Sirius, and I had to make up excuse after excuse for my older brother Sirius to everyone.

To me magic is magic there is no such thing as a good or evil spell. It depends on how it is used for even a simple spell can be used to cause damage. For example a soap charm normally used to clean floors if used on a person's mouth for a certain amount of time can kill them. Oh looks like the sorting is over and time to eat dinner. After I was finished eating I left to Slytherin's 3rd year common room and Arty followed.

Arty asked me eagerly "So, Reggie when will the plan happen?"

A simple question needs a simple answer. So I replied simply with "When the time is right of course. Anyway how was your summer?"

I of course had no idea when I should put the plan into action, but I'm not telling Arty about it. Arty replied bitterly "My father was working almost 24/7 and my poor Mother was left to cry. Of course I was there for her when she was depressed. We are not poor yet my Father feels to work like a mad man. Always, Always about work and so on. Same old same old kind of thing going on, Reggie."

The room was a bit warm; I was too lazy to make my way to turn the fire place off besides Arty might be cold. I took off my cloak and unbuttoned my first two buttons. I folded my cloak and I told Arty "At least you have a mother who cares about you. I know my parents only wanted heirs to the Black Family name. I overheard them talking about it once. I'm a back up if my brother fails."

I really didn't mind that much and as far as they know Sirius has not failed. I'll never ever if I can help it let them know. At least my parents can't do legilimency or Sirius would be in trouble. Maybe I should look up how to block out those who can perform legilimency. All through it would be difficult, I'm willing to research, and try to do it.

I looked at Arty who looked quite red and maybe feverish. I suppose he is coming down with an illness or something. I sighed and thought to myself how bothersome for I might catch it. I really dislike getting sick. I asked Arty "Are you feeling ill?"

Arty seemed a bit flushed, but then replied quickly "It feels really warm in the room."

I looked and saw that the fire place was on. I walked over and then asked "Better, Arty?"

Arty nodded and he looked a little pale now. I sighed lightly and told him "Arty, Arty you are so sensitive about the temperature. Just do what I do when it is cold put on some more clothing. When it is warm then take off your cloak."

Arty told "That is a good idea Reggy."

I looked at the time and there are going to be classes tomorrow. It is best to go to sleep early and wake up early no need to get bags under my eyes. I walked to the sleeping area and Arty follows. Arty's bed is next to mine on my right. I changed into my night clothing that are a dark blue and went fast to my own dream world. However after a while it turns into a nightmare and it was about my brother saying 'You are no brother of mine. You are weak, pitiful, and easy to hate.' I woke up with tears running down my cheeks and I mutter to myself "Just a nightmare. Calm down and go back asleep."

I dreamt of my early childhood with my older brother Sirius and before I knew it, time to rise and shine to eat some breakfast at the great hall, but of course I was early. I was walking when I saw a fourth year student calling Lily Evans a mudblood. I honestly do not use that word unless around Mother or Father for it is a stupid and out dated name plus no human has mud in their veins. How stupid it is to call anyone a mudblood.

I sighed and walked over to the dumb Slytherin person who I didn't even bother to remember his name. He said to me "Evans is a filthy mudb--"

I stated flatly "Shut up that word is so very outdated that it is not even funny. Plus makes you sound like an idiot."

He sneered "You're defending--"

This person is highly annoying and I do not like his tone. He is highly emotional and not seeing the point.

I said to him sharply "My point is the term is outdated."

Then I smirked at him and added "Of course you do not use big words now do you. Plus have no knowledge of the fact no human can live with mud in their veins. Every living animal or person has blood."

He snarled "Black, you are insulting me a fourth year. I'm Ranga Sand."

I laughed mocking and then told him "I don't give a damn at all Sand about years. Not all older people are smart. Now you're getting off topic. My case is the term you use is over used, honestly how shameful are you Mister Sand to use old words, and with no intelligence at all."

Sand snapped "Shut up Black."

I replied "My case and point. You're a disgrace to every single wizard. Go before I have to hex you for wasting my time."

Sand decided to try and hex me. I smirked and blocked the hex then cast a half way body bind. I sneered to him "And next time Sand watch your mouth around me. I'm from the Black family and I hate disrespectful idiots. Now Mister Sand say to Evans that you're sorry for that lame ass insult."

Sand muttered "Damn you Black. Evans I'm sorry that lame ass insult. Now let me go."

I remarked "Uh can't hear you Mister Sand. You're like a mouse."

Sand flushed red then yelled "Damnit all right fine! Evans, Sorry for that lame ass insult!"

Lily Evans looked stunned and I stated "Okay, Sand. Do yourself a favor and be more creative or it will be boring."

I undid the spell and Sand walked away quickly cursing. Evans started to say "Than--"

I sighed then stated flatly "No, need for that Evans. I just did that because I found that term highly annoying since almost everyone in Slytherins every single day. Along with the family, family friends, and almost every single pure blooded that is not a so called traitor. I of course am a special case for I happen to find uncreative insult to be dreadfully boring. Best not to tell my brother Sirius for he would not believe it anyways and I'll be going Evans."

I knew Sirius wouldn't ever believe it and he would call me a liar or claim I'm up to something.

I heard Evans mutter "He is Sirius's brother."

I rolled my eyes and thought to myself 'Honestly, some People lack creative insults or even witty ones.'

-Third Power -

Lily decided to go up to Sirius and ask him what his brother's name is for the boy didn't tell her.

Lily politely asked "What is your younger brother's name."

Sirius spite out "Regulus. I hate my family."

Then Sirius asked "Why did he do something? I'll be back!"

Sirius went to find Regulus and then James asked "Did he insult you? "

Lily rolled her eyes then replied "No, in fact he sort of stood up for me when a 4th year Slytherin used that term 'Mudblood'."

James eyebrows raised and he asked "Really?"

Lily stated "He said it was outdated, old, boring, uncreative, and highly annoying since a lot of people use it. Then he hexed the guy and told him to say sorry. I was shocked."

James said to Lily "And Sirius doesn't even know about it. Although I highly doubt Sirius will believe it unless he sees it with his own eyes. "

-Back to Regulus's View-

I had eaten a quick breakfast then I saw my brother walking towards me with an annoyed expression. He always yells first then asks questions later. I prepared myself for his yells and calmed myself.

Sirius sneered "You called her a mudblood didn't you Regulus."

I decided to remain quiet for I knew he wouldn't believe me plus he has already made up his mind about it. I sighed and then Sirius yelled "Answer me!"

I stated quietly "Stop yelling brother."

Sirius snapped "Don't call me brother, I'm ashamed of having you as a brother, and you are not worth anything to me."

Those words hurt a whole lot and I choose to ignore it. He doesn't know or he doesn't believe the truth. I calmed myself to keep the tears at bay and I told him "Brothe--"

Sirius grabbed my wrists and then told me sharply "Don't call me that Regulus for you are not worthy of calling me that at all. You called Lily Evans a mudblood."

My brother doesn't know his own strength and I tried to look like I'm not in pain. I can handle this pain at least he is here talking to me even though he is being cruel. I felt numb, my two best friends are not here, and everyone is staring. Sirius never listens anymore since Hogwarts and always having excuses for our parents. I said to him quietly "Brot--"

His grip tightened, my pulse was racing, and I was feeling slightly faint. I stated faintly "Brother, I didn't call her that at all."

Sirius snapped "You're lying."

He didn't believe me and Evans wasn't able to tell him for he just assumed before it was over. My head was getting dizzy and I managed to say "Brother, I'm not lying." Then I passed out and the world was a blur. When I woke up I saw Severus and Arty they were worried. I looked at my wrists and they felt tender plus of course bruised.

I said to them "I'm fine. I Just passed out from the pain."

Severus raised an eyebrow. Arty said to me "It was Sirius again wasn't it Reggy."

I replied "Sadly, yes. I didn't have the heart to hex him to next Thursday."

Severus asked "And how did it occur?"

I told them everything and in ending said "Sadly I do not have luck and he didn't believe me. Sirius takes after Mother in her temper, stubbornness, and pride in some ways such as believing he is not ever wrong."

Arty said to me "You're right about the word mudblood being overused."

I replied "Yes. Plus it makes them want to prove themselves even more and so on you know Arty. Also that 4th year ticked me off acting as if just because he is older that he is correct."

I had decided to add that bit mainly to also have a little bit of fact to it. Some wizards have no motive to become stronger and try to insult others which in turn make them stronger, but for a reason it makes muggle borns even more motive to prove themselves. When even without being even insulted do their best unlike some lazy purebloods that have nothing, but an old insult with in itself is quite pitiful.

Severus told me flatly "You have a way of upsetting the older boys."

The older Slytherins well most of them are easy to upset and fun to toy with like I'm a Kitten playing with a mouse.

I smirked then replied "Of course since I'm not being the typical 3rd year Slytherin."

Most of the third year and lower years learn from the fourth year and higher. I of course don't care what the higher years say since they have not earned my respect, trust, or anything. I found them to be prats who can't get off their high horse and admit when they are wrong. So far I have not had to say 'sorry' due to the fact that I make sure to make no mistakes. My brother Sirius does not believe me and I have no idea to make him see the truth of the matter.

_**Brother,**_

_**Why can't believe me?**_

_**I'm telling the truth,**_

_**It is painful to me,**_

_**My emotions are a wreck.**_

_**Don't how to make you believe me,**_

_**I just don't understand,**_

_**You hurt me deeply inside my heart,**_

_**But I'll forgive you.**_

_**For you don't know any better,**_

_**Hogwarts has changed you,**_

_**What has happened to you?**_

_**I want my brother back,**_

_**The one who protected me,**_

_**The one who cared about me,**_

_**The one who loved me.**_

_**What have you become my brother,**_

_**My brother Sirius?**_

**_I won't ever give up,_**

**_I'll do anything to have you notice me,_**

**_I will not lose hope._**

**_No matter how hopeless it might seen,_**

**_It will be worth it._**

_**---- **_

Please Review.


	13. Emotional Mess

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View.

Please Review and Thank You. Please let me know what you think about this story. Is it original? Regulus is growing, a complete wreck, a mess of emotions, and in general very mixed up/confused.

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

**---**

"Hey, Reggy. Why do you think that people can be so damn selfish?" Arty asked me on a painfully sunny day while we were sitting under the shaded tree. The shaded tree is a bit away from Hogwarts, but no one will be looking for us. "I mean my father is selfish by having his work overtake his life and barely even being home."

"Arty, Arty. There are many different viewpoints in life some would claim your father is doing the best he can to support his family, but others might say that your father is noble for making those kind of sacrifices. There is also the viewpoint of him being greedy and wanting only money not caring that he barely spends time with his wife and child." I replied calmly as I twirled my wand and had my eyes closed. I was suddenly hugged and I opened my eyes then sighed softly. Arty can be clingy maybe due to the fact he feels like that he is not loved enough, but of course his Mother loves him and the only negative is his Father is hardly home.

"It's alright Arty, your Mother loves you, and you are not alone in this world. I can go on with examples of others viewpoints that people can and will have of your Father. However let's move onto the topic of your Mother." I went on to say calmly and I looked at Arty.

"I know my mum is trying to pull it together, but she keeps on crying wanting for him to be home more often. I try and comfort her the best that I can for her. My mum loves and cares about me, but she wants him to spend more time with us." Arty replied sadly and had his hand around my wrist. Honestly almost everyone wants to grab my wrist and it can be annoying, but at least he is not crying. I should not jinx myself with such thoughts, but I can be quite negative at times.

"Well, Your Father is her husband after all. Of course she would be sad and cry because the man she loves will not stay home for a little bit. Maybe your Mother is even regretting marrying him and wished that instead—" I started to say calmly, but then Arty started tearing up. I sighed and allowed Arty to hug me while bearing his head onto my shoulder. He was basically on my lap and I ignored my annoyance since his crying will pass plus I was being so called insensitive to his feelings. I suppose it is my punishment for not paying a bit more attentive of my words, but damnit all it is hot outside today. Adding body warmth is non-too smart and will equal more sweat.

Art is emotional and tends to cry, but then again it can't be helped. As soon as he is done crying we will go back to Slytherin and take a damn shower. I paid no mind to Arty as I thought about what my brother would be doing right now. More than likely enjoying the sunny weather and playing with his best friends. I closed my eyes and sighed at the thought.

Severus is more than likely with his best friend Lily and I have a feeling it will not end well. Arty's legs were wrapped around my hips now and still weeping. More than likely thinking about more negative thoughts and I sighed lightly. I can be too nice for my own good and I felt his tears on my neck. Great my neck is wet, the weather is burning hot, and extra body warmth is not helping. I have given have enough time for Arty to try and solve it on his own.

"Arty, It is best not to think too much on it. Besides it really hot out here and I feel like I'm roasting on an open fire. Let's go back to Slytherin and take a shower." I said calmly as I gently pried Arty away from my neck and opened my eyes. Arty's face looked red and he got off my lap.

"Sorry about that Reggy." Arty commented quietly and looked down. I rolled my eyes in annoyance and he is being difficult along with being a pain.

"Shut up, Arty. No need to be sorry after all you are my best friend." I commented lightly. "If you were not then I would have more than likely left you."

"Alright, Reg." Arty replied while smiling happily and talk about mood swings. I stood up first and then helped Arty up using only one hand. We walked back to Slytherin and to the Third year room. There is only one shower and one toilet. I made it back to the room first and Arty looked like a wreck, but there is no way I'll go last.

"Arty, I have a brilliant idea." I said to Arty while twirling my wand.

"What is it, Reggy?" Arty asked me quietly and I was tempted to shove him.

"We can share a shower since you need it a lot, but I refuse to be last. So in the end everyone is happy and I'm not a heartless prat." I replied calmly and I looked at Arty. Arty turned red at the cheeks and looked a bit flushed. "Arty, it is not like we have different parts unless you're hiding something. It is not like you'll kill me in the shower and I won't try to kill you. Besides you're my best friend and I trust that you won't try to kill me with soap. Don't worry I'm one hundred percent male and not a female at all."

Arty nodded and we walked to the bathroom. I turned on the shower and made sure the water was warm. I took off my clothing and started to wash my hair. Arty was inside the shower too and I unlike some other students at Hogwarts am not afraid to share a shower when needed since as now. I have nothing to hide and I'm not ashamed for a body is a body when everything is said and done in the end. We came into this world naked and innocent without any clothing to cover ourselves. Arty is an only child and more than likely has not ever shared a bath or shower with anyone else.

I barely paid Arty any mind since I'm too busy thinking and remember. I remember when Sirius and I were little kids. I was five and he was six. We use to take baths together and played with the floating blue rubber duck that kept on moving away from us. I smiled and then sighed. I frowned and I knew that we can't go back to that way again. Sirius had at the age of ten refused to share the bath or shower since he will be going to Hogwarts next year. Sirius has changed so much and I do not know what to do about it.

I turned around and looked Arty in the eyes. I notice that his cheeks are tinted pink and more than likely due to the hotness of the water. I know that the mirrors are foggy and I sighed to myself. I at times truly hate change, but change will happen to everyone.

"Hey, Arty." I said to him calmly and saw that he blinked at me.

"Yes, Reg?" Arty asked me quietly and biting his own lip a habit that I had thought he grew out of already.

"You won't ignore me completely like my brother. Right?" I asked him while looking him in the eye and he gapped at me in surprise.

"I won't ever ignore you, Reggy. You're my best friend." Arty replied while looking shocked that I would ever ask such a question and I wanted to shove him for it. I turned off the water and then Arty hugged me tightly. I should of known that he would do such a thing, but it can't be helped. I'm just plain annoyed at his actions since I'm against that damn shower wall and I know for the fact it has not been cleaned in a while because the House Elves hardly visit the Slytherin bathrooms due to fear.

I sighed heavily since this hugging has become a habit for Arty and in time he will grow out of it. I can be too nice for my own good and Arty is a huggy person at least to me since I have not ever seen him hug Severus. Damnit my hips hurt because Arty's hip bone is on mine tightly and I frowned since his hug has grown tighter. I was about to yell at Arty, but then the door opened and I was relieved that Arty released me from that crushing hug. I looked at the person who opened the door and it was Severus. I was about to thank him, but Severus beat me to it.

"What on earth are you two doing?" Severus asked us calmly and I rolled my eyes.

"Arty here decided to hug me and that's it to be honest. What does it look like Severus?" I asked him calmly as I walked out of the shower and dried myself off while Arty just stood still.

"Nevermind, Regulus. Why were you two sharing the shower?" Severus asked me calmly and I have a feeling that he is annoyed with me.

"I decided to take pity on Arty since he looked like a wreck. Plus I did not want to have the shower last since I was sweaty." I replied lightly as I dressed myself and Arty was still standing still as if in shock. "Arty, get dried off and dressed already. You will catch a stupid cold and I will not have you blame me."

Arty nodded and I threw him a towel. Severus sighs and shakes his head at me. I walked out of the bathroom and Severus walked out too leaving Arty to change.

"Regulus, do you know what others would think of that scene that I saw in there?" Severus asked me calmly while looking at me with a serious look in his eyes.

"A hug of course. Arty is clingy and tends to hug at random times or when I hurt his feelings." I replied calmly and looked at Severus with sternness.

"Well, I would like to inform you not everyone is innocent as you Regulus. Some would go as far as to say that he was getting you off." Severus replied firmly and I blinked in confusion. Severus looked ready to hit his head against the wall or yell at me. I crossed my arms and glared at him.

"I have no idea as to what the bloody hell you are saying, Severus. The point is I do not care what other idea's that others may have of me and Arty. What do you mean by innocent? I'm from a Dark family with a Dark history. So according to others I'm tainted and evil, but I care little for their stupid thoughts on me. I'm me and only me not what others make of me or what they think that they know about me." I replied firmly and my lips were in a stern frown.

"Never mind, Regulus. I had a bad day." Severus replied calmly and sighed lightly to himself.

"Let me guess my brother and his best friends?" I asked lightly as I sat down on my bed and what in Merlin's beard is taking Arty so long getting dressed.

"Yes and they are complete pests." Severus commented as he sat down next to me and sighed.

"I remember the old days when my brother use to show that he care about me and we use to share everything up until he left for Hogwarts." I stated flatly as I twirled my wand and noticed that Arty came out, but looked flushed as if his face was tomato. I noticed that Severus sneered at Arty and that Arty just looked at the carpet. I know that Severus and Arty do not like each other at all.

"Personally, I hate Hogwarts. I hate how it changed my brother, I hate that because of Hogwarts he was taken from me, and I hate that there is a possibility that Sirius will keep on ignoring me or hurt me. At least if he hurts me then I know that before him I exist. However I like the fact because of Hogwarts that I have two best friends." I firmly told Severus and Arty. We went to the Great Hall to eat lunch and I had a small amount of food. I saw Sirius laughing with his best friends and I wish that I was sitting there with him. Sometimes I wish that I was not in Slytherin and that I was with my older brother. I frowned and noticed that Severus along with Arty sneaked away when I had looked away. I noticed Sen McCoy walking towards me and that hardly anyone is here since it is a Saturday more than likely sleeping in.

I ignored Sen McCoy and just watched Sirius making actions with his hands. I do not want to cause a scene and I know that Len McCoy is not at the Slytherin table. I felt a hand on my wrist and I frowned.

"Heh, you little bitch. I'll humiliate you right now in front of everyone and there is nothing you can do. Your brother doesn't care, your friends are not here, and no one gives a damn." Sen sneered to me and I kept my face blank of any emotions.

"I'm not afraid of you." I replied calmly even as his grip tightened. "Even if you yell, scream, curse, or other such things. I will not fear such a pathetic little boy such as you."

Sen gritted his teeth together and gripped my other wrist. I smirked and then laughed loudly it almost sounded insane just like Bella's laughter. No one looks at the Slytherin table unless there is a prank or something of that sort.

"Like I said no matter what you do or say I will not fear you." I replied smoothly and the grip was bruising on my arms. I paid no mind to my brother or his friends. "So why not just do something stupid and get into some trouble, Darling."

"You damn bitch." Sen snarled viciously and I did not wince at the pain in my wrists that seem to always get hurt. "I'll take away something from you."

Sen shoved me down and had his lips on mine harshly. I bite his tongue enough to make it bleed and shoved him away viciously. I can't hold my temper inside anymore and my eyes were flashing with rage. The Black family are known for their tempers and I for the most part keep control of it.

"Sen McCoy, I will make your life a living hell! I will show you no mercy! I will make you pay dearly for doing such a thing to me!" I yelled loudly and not caring for the stares from the other Houses. "You will find no peace here not ever! You will live and suffer!"

I glared at him and had my wand pointed at him. I was beyond caring about witnesses and I saw Sen McCoy pale. I smirked and looked him in the eyes.

"You better leave right now or I swear to Merlin that I will hex you into Kingdom Kong right here in front of everyone." I said coldly and my lips in a firm frown. "Make your choice, Darling."

"I'm not afraid." Sen replied while looking pale and I smirked.

"You should be, McCoy." I replied and Sen took out his wand, but I disarmed him and had his wand in my hand. "I'll start with this sweetie."

I broke his wand in half and Sen screamed out in rage.

"I warned you, You just didn't listen, and no need to scream." I replied while smirking and holding back my insane laughter. I silenced him, turned his skin Scarlet and Gold, transformed his outfit into a pretty little hot pink dress, and then kicked him harshly onto the floor.

"Never ever mess with me again." I told him coldly as I had his wand that is in two pieces and then burned it. "Never try such a thing again or it will be worse, sweet heart."

Sen McCoy looked up at me with fear and terror in his eyes. Then I bent over and whispered darkly next to his ear so that no one can hear it expect for Sen McCoy "It will be worse when you are alone and there is no one around. You can bet on that McCoy for you messed with the wrong Black."

I stood up again and looked at the shocked faces of everyone in the hall for after all I'm known as the quiet Black.

"And that everyone is why no one should force a French Kiss on anyone." I stated calmly and everyone heard since it was that quiet. "Using force on anyone is just asking for trouble. You can get off the floor McCoy it is a disgrace, but then again you are a complete disgrace for a wizard despite being a pure blood. You are scum the worst kind in the whole world."

I walked away and knew I was going to be in trouble, but I do not give a damn. When I was outside that was when someone grabbed my wrist and it was my brother Sirius. I noticed that Potter and Lupin were behind him.

"Regulus,--" Sirius started to say, but then Severus showed up and I sighed heavily. Potter was glaring at Severus and I knew it will not end well at all.

"I remember a time when you called me Reg." I commented quietly. "I know what is lost can't be regained, but I can't stop wishing for it to be regained."

"Regulus, let's go now." Severus said to me smoothly while glaring at Potter.

"You can go on ahead. I'll be alright." I said to Severus firmly and then noticed Sirius glaring at Severus. "Besides it is not like they will force anything like that damn McCoy."

"What did McCoy do now?" Severus asked me firmly and I glared at him.

"Why not ask the git. I'm busy." I snapped and I'm not in a good mood. Severus left and the glares were gone.

"Why did you laugh like our cousin Bellatrix." Sirius said to me and I sighed heavily for it was not what I thought he would say to me, but then again I should have guessed it.

"Let's just say I snapped, I had enough of it, and I believe I'm going insane. Pretty funny, right? I hate Hogwarts, I really do hate this school, and I hate being harassed by almost everyone here. My older housemates and the other Houses. I find this House stuff to be stupid and it tears people apart just because they are not together in the same House." I stated coldly and looking my brother in the eye. "This school is divided into four Houses and they do not work together at all. United we are strong, but divided we fall. Guess what everyone is falling and it is fast. You know even housemates will ditch the other even for the most stupidest reasons in the whole world. This School Tears People Apart and Into Little Pieces."

"What do you know, Regulus about uniting anything." My brother snapped at me harshly and glaring at me. I chuckled and my wrist was let go for Sirius gripped his wand instead. Potter and Lupin just looked at us. I noticed faintly that my brother left and Potter, but I answered. My eyes were watery and I felt numb.

"Dear brother, I try so hard, but I fail. I fail so bad, oh merlin knows it, but I try so damn hard. I still care and that will not end. It is tearing me up and I feel like I'm going insane. Completely and utterly insane." I said with emotion and my throat felt raw. "You just don't try and understand. You never listen anymore and it hurts so damn much. I don't care about what Mother and Father think, but I'm afraid to tell them and I lie to them for you. This place is ripping and tearing me to pieces. I'm so damn weak and pathetic."

I was on the ground on my knees, my eyes looking at the ground, and my body shaking. My lips felt raw and tainted. I want this pain to end and I can't take it anymore. I looked at my wand and tried to think of a spell, but couldn't think at all. I smiled faintly and looked at my hands. Tears still falling down and it has started to rain. I put my hands around my neck and started to choke myself, but suddenly a set of hands pulled my hands from my own neck.

"Why stop me, Lupin. The world would be better off with one less Black." I managed to say. "Besides my own brother hates me, my older classmates hate me, and all the other houses hate me. I'm very much hated and not loved at all."

"Suicide is not the answer." Lupin stated firmly and I laughed.

"The funny thing is I wished my brother would stop me, but I'm so foolish." I replied while holding myself. "My friends ask me, Is he worth it. Funny enough my answer is still Yes. Love is indeed foolish and blind, but I care not."

Insanity must really run in the family, but then again maybe not.

"Regulus, he won't follow in his family's way of thinking." Lupin replied calmly and stared at me with those judging eyes.

"Sirius and everyone else will not believe you. I do not give a damn what Mother and Father think, but I let them believe several lies. One that I hate muggles, muggle-borns, and so on. I do not care about bloodlines, but I lie to them and almost everyone. I'm such a wonderful actor. Two that Sirius is a spy, but it makes them keep him in Hogwarts. I best be going now, I see Arty looking a bit upset, and Lupin no one will believe you." I said to him coldly and walked toward Arty.

"Hey, Reggy. What was that all about?" Arty asked me quietly and I smiled at him brightly.

"Nothing, but let's play in this marvelous rain." I replied calmly and Arty smiled at me. We danced in the rain and got soaking wet, but I personally cared little about it since I love the rain completely. Love is love and gender does not matter. I do not believe in forcing love upon someone for that is wrong. To love someone means that you want that person to be happy even without you.

**I feel as if I'm broken and no one can fix me,**

**I feel like I'm going insane,**

**I feel too much.**

**I want to be numb,**

**Numb to this world,**

**Numb to this pain in my heart.**

**I care too much,**

**It is tearing me to pieces,**

**My heart is broken, torn, shattered, and in pieces,**

**No one can fix or repair me.**

**I'm such a wreck,**

**Unstable and so emotional.**

**My brother still doesn't care,**

**Still not understanding me,**

**Still not listening to me,**

**Still judging me.**

**I'm torn,**

**On should I die to save myself from more pain,**

**Or to keep on living for hope for the future.**

**I'm spinning and I can't stop,**

**No one can stop me,**

**Expect for you Sirius,**

**But you do not care at all.**

**I still hope that you will care about me again,**

**I hold onto that hope,**

**For now I'll keep on living.**

-------------

Please Review and Thank You. There will be chapters.


	14. Professor Dumbledore

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View.

Please Review and Thank You. Please let me know what you think about this story.

Rated M for a reason.

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

I feel worn out and I overheard Len McCoy bragging to some other slytherin's.

"I managed to get a House Elf to add some essence of insanity onto Regulus Black's food, but had to lied to the damn worthless creature." Len McCoy boasted and I felt very annoyed such for one I was drugged plus that damn cocky jerk degrading a House Elf that had helped him although said House Elf didn't know what it was doing. I know what the Essence Of Insanity causes a person's emotions to be highly unstable at times and I remember Sirius commenting when he was about nine about how our cousin Bella must have had a high dose of it, but then again Sirius has always hated Bella.

Of course something had to be off since normally I do not yell or scream threats and promises of those sorts in front of other witnesses. That damn idiot has no idea as what he has done and I'm highly annoyed. Those dratted McCoy brothers shall bloody pay for their offences to me and I slipped away unseen by their eyes.

I'm in my third year of Hogwarts, but I'm a Black. I know a spell that would be cruel and not to mention unusual. It would be killing two birds with one stone as some would call it. I smirked to myself in a way very similar to my cousin Bella. To be honest drugging a member of the Black family whether male or female is very insane since after all most of us are already mad. The spell shall be simple and last only a mere twenty four hour period, but the results will be dire ad I do not give a damn. My blood is singing for revenge against those McCoy brothers and a lesson that they shall not soon forget Never Mess With Regulus Black.

I was alone since I let Arty sleep in and knowing Severus he is with Lily Evans. I know for a fact that damn Essence of Insanity is still affecting me for I can feel it in my blood and in my veins tainting them. I was walking towards the great hall and I held back hysterical laughter by biting my lip, but then Potter and Lupin appeared before me.

"Darlings, Don't keep me from my food. My meal was spiked yesterday with Essence of Insanity by a lousy no good son of a bitch that happens to be Len McCoy." I said while giggling and my eyes were wide. I could not fully control my words or body.

"What the bloody hell?" Potter asked in confusion and I giggled in a giddy way.

"Emotions unstable, prone to insane actions, thoughts, and deranged laughter. At times giggling or hysterical laughter." I managed to reply smoothly after a moment. "No cure, only choice is to wait it out, and stay away from me. I don't want Sirius hating me."

Inside the Great Hall I ate a little food and I heard Len McCoy giggling. I forgot that moron had my food spiked yesterday and I'm such an idiot. I managed to make it outside by the lake and laughed in a sadist manner. I smirked as I watched Potter following Lily Evans.

"Potter, Potter following a pretty flower. A Pot wanting a little bity Lily." I singed while giggling and twirling in a circle. Potter stormed over fuming and his face red with his fists tightly clenched. I giggled and fell down onto the flower patch that was near the lake.

"No one cares about the little snakes in the garden and the snakes care not for each other. What a sad and tragic life? Should it end. Maybe or maybe not? Blood is life energy and red. Scarlet is such a pretty color." I said to Potter happily while smiling. "Want to see, Potter? I can slit my wrist open and see the lovely scarlet blood rush out like a pretty waterfall."

Potter didn't look angry for being made fun, but had a look of horror on his face. I couldn't stop myself from pointing my wand onto my own wrist. I'm afraid and my heart is pounding in terror along with silent tears running down my cheeks. No one would care if a Slytherin commited suicide not even a Slytherin. Then a hand smacked my wand out of my hand and grabbed said wand swiftly. I was dragged to an area that was unseen to others and my heart had stopped pounding.

"You are Sirius's younger brother regardless of all other things. I won't let you kill yourself." Potter said to me firmly and I blinked in confusion. "I'm casting an Anti-Suicide spell onto you."

Potter was serious and it was no trick.

"Len McCoy spiked my food again with Essence of Insanity." I said calmly to Potter.

"Essence Of Insanity." Potter repeated back to me and I nodded.

"Correct. It is not illegal, but can be quite dangerous for the one that drinks it along with others around said person." I told Potter calmly and his grip on my wrist was not tight or harsh. "I must speak with the House Elves since it is very dangerous to listen to a student's request of adding something."

Potter's grip tightened a little and I sighed lightly.

"It is dangerous no matter how simple. One must think of a possible negative reaction with a person's body and it can bloody kill someone. Anyone and everyone who has ever requested a little something to be added has been lucky that no one is dead yet. My suggestion is for everyone to get creative and quit tainting the good food that those House Elves worked so hard to make for everyone including ungrateful students." I said coldly while looking at Potter who looked a bit pale. "House against House or Houses perfectly wonderful food made by hard working House Elves should not be tainted. Also the trust that the House Elves have for everyone in this school should not be abused for any reason. Potions are dangerous and not meant to be abused. They are meant to help people not cause pain, humiliation, or anything negative."

Potter looked thoughtful and then nodded.

"You are not like what Sirius has said about you." Potter said to me in a stunned voice.

"I'm my own person." I replied smoothly. "I'm just me not anyone else. I'm not like my Brother, but I'm not like Mother or Father. I have my own views and beliefs, but no one has bothered to ask me. Always negative since after all I'm a Black and a Slytherin. "

Potter looked surprised and I sighed heavily to myself.

"I won't ever really like you because you and the other students at Hogwarts took Sirius away from me. To be honest Sirius will not believe you since he is blinded by pride and sheer stubbornness. He'll only be angry with you if you so much as say my name." I stated flatly and I smiled bitterly. "I have no idea as to why he bloody hates me so damn much. My only option was Slytherin since Mother and Father would be furious. Sirius was the one that they cared for the most since he is their first born while I'm only the back up if he screws up royally."

"You are different from what Sirius has said about you." Potter said to me calmly and I smiled in a bitter manner.

"He just doesn't understand and to be honest he is quite sheltered. I'm protecting him from Mother and Father. They wanted to take him out of Hogwarts, but I convinced them otherwise." I replied smoothly and kept on smiling bitterly. "I do not want him to be disowned. I still care and love my brother despite his obvious hate of me."

"Do not mention this to my brother since he will be quite upset and won't believe you. More than likely yell and he can be very stubborn." I added lightly as I walked away after Potter gave me back my wand, but then I heard Potter ask a question.

"Do you hate Muggle-Borns?" Potter asked me and I sighed.

"No." I replied simply and lost track of time as I walked back to Hogwarts. I walked to the Kitchens and went inside. I hate the fact that some people are willing to exploit House Elves and they are innocent not to mention very loyal to those that treat them with respect. I managed to convince the House Elves to say no to any requests regarding adding items into the food. I plan on informing the Head Master about it tomorrow and I walked out then I saw Sen McCoy. I smirked as I hid from his sight and I silently casted a spell onto him. The spell will make it so that when he saw his brother that he will think it is me and I walked to the Slytherin common room. Arty grabbed me and pulled me into the third year bedroom.

"Reggy, I know that bastard Len McCoy drugged with the Essence Of Insanity." Arty said to me and I just nodded.

"I heard yesterday that Sen McCoy kissed yo—" Arty started to say, but I glared at him harshly.

"Shut up, I hated it. That did not count." I snapped viciously and Arty mutely nodded in agreement.

"How you would like to be kissed in such a manner, Darling Little Arty?" I asked happily while giggling in a hysterical manner and Arty slowly backed away onto my bed. My actions and words that I couldn't control damn that Essence of Insanity. I kissed Arty on the lips and my tongue went inside, but Arty didn't bite it. His arms were around me in a hug and his legs were between my legs. I was snogging him and his knee went up towards my private area not in a manner of violence. I moaned and now I'm back in control. I pulled away in horror and my hands felt my tear stained face.

"I'm so sorry, Arty. I couldn't fight that Essence Of Insanity." I said while my body shook and tears kept on flowing down my cheeks. Arty pulled me into his lap and held me while resting his chin onto the top of my head.

"Come on, Reggy. I don't hate you." Arty said to me firmly as he held me tightly in his arms and I felt relieved. "Never you, Reg. I would not ever hate you."

"Arty, You and Severus have to stay away from me." I said softly and tried to get out of his arm, but Arty held me firmly and I felt incredibly weak not to mention drained.

"Hell no, I'm not leaving me." Arty said to me firmly and I sighed heavily. "Let's go to the Head Master that goody good Dumbledore. I don't like him, but he might be able to help you."

I nodded mutely and Arty let go of me. We walked out of the Slytherin Third Year Bedroom and went on our way to the Head Master's Office.

"I could go in with you." Arty said to me quietly and I shook my head.

"No, Arty. It is quite alright, I will be alright, and be calm." I replied to Arty smoothly and then said the password. I walked inside and saw the Head Master Professor Dumbledore. For a brief moment I saw that he looked a bit surprised, but I suppose it is because most Slytherin do not willing go to his office. I can't fault him for looking surprised and I took a small breath then released it.

"Hello, Mr. Black. What brings you here to my office?" Dumbledore asked me calmly and I know that the Slytherin is not his favorite, but then again almost everyone in the three other Houses hate Slytherin .

"Hello, Professor Dumbledore." I replied calmly and felt a bit awkward.

"Please, Do take a seat." He said to me and I sat down onto the chair. I felt a bit more relax, but still had a slight sense of nervousness. I bit my lip and had no idea as to how I should tell Professor Dumbledore.

"Would you like a lemon drop?" Professor Dumbledore asked me and I looked him in the eyes.

"Yes, Please. Thank You." I said to Professor Dumbledore as I took the lemon drop and plopped into my mouth. I trust that the Head Master would not poison or cause damage to any of the Hogwarts Students regardless of their House.

"Sorry for wasting your time so far, but I have to inform you of something." I said calmly to him as I looked him directly in the eyes. I have to inform him about Len McCoy spiking my food from yesterday and today with Essence Of Insanity. I can't go on like this with unstable emotions and the close calls. The fear and horror of really being dead and the fact of the matter it was almost done by my own wand. The possibility of hurting my friends or my brother is even more horrific and terrible then the thought of almost killing myself with my own wand. I cleared my throat and forced myself to speak more.

"Professor Dumbledore, Len McCoy spiked my food yesterday and today with Essence of Insanity. My proof are the House Elves that described what it looked like and so on, but not knowing about what it can do or even the name of it. I do not blame the House Elves for they too were victims and cruelly exploited by an ungrateful student. I overheard Len McCoy bragging about it." I said to Professor Dumbledore calmly as I held my hands together to keep myself occupied.

"Please do go on, ." Professor Dumbledore said to me kindly and I bit my lip. Should I tell him about Sen McCoy? About what he did and last year. I furiously wiped my eyes to keep my tears from making their way down to my cheeks and I tried to speak, but it was too painful to tell. I was so weak, caught off guard, and ill-prepared not to mention last year Potter saved me from Sen McCoy.

"Professor Dumbledore, It is too painful to say out loud. If it is not too much trouble please do ask Sen McCoy what he did to me yesterday and what he tried last year." I said to him quietly and I kept eye contact with Professor Dumbledore. I remember the pure terror I had felt when Sen McCoy forced onto me a French Kiss and what he tried to do last year.

"It is not too much trouble. I will ask Sen McCoy." Professor Dumbledore replied calmly, but I can tell by his eyes that he was not happy and more than likely my fault. "It will be alright, Regulus Black."

"Thank You, Professor Dumbledore." I said to him calmly and it felt like a weight was lifted. In the end Sen and Len McCoy were both expelled from Hogwarts. I was in the Hospital Wing for two weeks without my wand for my own safety along with others safety.

Please Review and Thank You. There will be more chapters.


	15. To Get Back At Him

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View.

Please Review and Thank You. Please let me know what you think about this story.

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

"Man, Reggy. Dumbledore was really serious and firm." Arty said to me and I sighed heavily to myself. "There are some new rules such as using force whether magical or muggle means to kiss someone will not be tolerated. The selling, making, using, buying of Essence Of Insanity will not be tolerated."

"Oh, Well." I commented lightly. "Sen and Len McCoy are gone."

"How are you feeling?" Arty asked me firmly as he stared at me with such a serious look in his eyes.

"Much better." I replied calmly as I twirled my wand and smiled faintly. I was laying down on my bed, closed my eyes, and still feeling worn out. Arty was on top of me, I knew that because I opened my eyes as soon as I felt some weight on me, and I sighed for I knew it was pay back. His hands firmly on my hips and his lips on mine giving me a light kiss. I rolled my eyes and Arty stopped.

"Pay back, Reg. So no more feeling guilty inside." Arty said to me while grinning.

"Fine, but for that one you will be a damn teddy bear." I stated calmly to him and I fell asleep with Arty hugging me with his arms around my back lightly. The curtains were spelled shut and silenced too so we won't hear the annoying sounds the other third years make such as snoring. When I woke up the next morning I felt a weight on top of me and I sighed heavily.

"Arty, Wake up." I said firmly as I pushed him off and he blinked at me.

"Huh?" Arty asked me and I was tempted to smack him behind his head, but I held back from that action.

"Come on let's go to that abandoned dungeon area." I said to Arty while smirking.

"What?" Arty asked me in confusion and then while he yawned has his hand over his mouth.

"I will show it to you. Of course it is a bit hidden and you have to be smart enough to answer." I replied while grinning and Arty got out of my bed. I led the way and it is still very early in the morning. The portrait was a snake and it asked several riddles which I answered correctly.

"Wow, Reggy. You are brilliant." Arty said to me in awe and amazement. I sighed and rolled my eyes.

"See it is a perfect place for various things. It is still filthy, but it shows that it has been abandoned for quite a long time. The Abandoned Dungeon." I told Arty while smiling happily and he smiled back at me.

"Reg, Are you planning to write a book about it?" Arty asked me teasingly and I grinned.

"Well of course Arty, but I shall not reveal as to where the location happens to be at for then there would be no fun in it." I replied calmly and then I pulled out my wand. "Now onto important matters, Arty. Let's start cleaning this area."

"Then wouldn't the effect be ruined?" Arty asked me and I snickered.

"Not at all it would still be Abandoned, but it would be more healthier. I for one do not want to end up sneezing and sneezing until my nose bleeds." I replied firmly and my arms were crossed. "Besides this Dungeon can be used for many things plus it is only us. Not the other older and very annoying Slytherins or anyone else. Should I tell Severus?"

"No. It is better kept between two people besides I'm sure you can find some other place and stuff like that Regulus. Your great at finding new area's in Hogwarts." Arty commented lightly and I smiled.

"Alright, I won't tell Severus." I said to Arty and he smiled brightly at me. "Besides he's been hanging out more with Avery, Mulciber, Evan Rosier, and Wilkes."

"Oh, That's right I heard that mudb--. Sorry I meant I heard that red haired bitch talking about in a nasty tone to Snape about it the other day." Arty said to me calmly and I sighed heavily.

"Arty, Arty. You really need to be even more creative, but that shall do after all she is not in front of you." I commented in a dry tone and Arty sulked. "Now as for the punishment it is to clean this area. I'm not as cruel as to ask you to clean without your wand since I highly doubt you can without it."

In the end Arty tried to clean without magic, but he kept on slipping on the wet floor. I was giggling hysterically at the sight and Arty was blushing like a ripe tomato. I used my wand to cast a spell that would dry Arty off and I looked at the now somewhat clean area. I rolled my eyes, pointed my wand at the area casting a spell, and it became sparkling clean.

"What the hell?" Arty asked me while gapping at me and I smirked lightly.

"Well, I found this little spell in the Black library in my house." I replied while smirking. "It was in a diary of one of them and before it had written 'Like Hell I as a Black Will cast several spells just to clean the kitchen. A little spell to have one room clean just in case said Husband wants a room to be dusty.' There are several upon several diaries in our library."

"Is there one for a whole entire house?" Arty asked me with curiosity in his eyes.

"Yes, but that is for another day." I replied while smirking. Arty pouted and then I grabbed his elbow softly. "I can't be like a whore who gives it all away."

"I didn't ever think of you as being one, Reggy." Arty replied calmly and I grinned.

"Well, Arty. What if I wore girl clothing?" I asked innocently.

"I wouldn't mind remember I saw you and I took photo's of you for you." Arty replied while smiling at me and I had a brilliant idea. I transformed my outfit into a black mini skirt and a mid drift showing sleeveless black shirt. Arty stared and I smirked.

"What if I wore this Arty?" I asked while smirking and Arty shook his head.

"Reggy, I still wouldn't even so much as think of you as a whore." Arty said to me firmly and I sighed heavily. I twirled my wand and decided that Arty is also very stubborn.

"Fine, Arty. Now then Severus is spending more time with Avery, Mulciber, Evan Rosier, and Wilkes. Personally I have not bothered to talk with older Slytherins besides Severus of course." I commented smoothly.

"So, What are you thinking?" Arty asked in confusion and I smiled lightly at him.

"Well, They are Severus's friends and I would like to see what they are all about. Call it being nosy, but I want to make sure they are not forcing Severus to be their friend. If they are let's just say the rest of their time at Hogwarts will not be pleasant." I replied calmly as I twirled my wand it is a little habit that I have since I could remember.

"When?" Arty asked me and I smiled faintly.

"Arty, Arty. Sometimes it is best to not have a plan for everything such as a small event such like the meeting of Severus other friends." I commented lightly and then retransformed my outfit back to what it was in the first place. "For now let's go to breakfast."

We walked to the Great Hall and sat at the Slytherin table. I poured myself three glasses of orange juice and then my brother walked over to me looking none too happy. Both Arty and I stood up. Sirius grabbed my wrist and glared at me.

"Dumbledore, told me what has happened to you. Why the hell didn't you tell me." Sirius snapped at me and I looked him in the eye.

"No need for you to know. I did not want you to know how weak I'm compared to others. For such a thing to happen to me and how stupid I'm personally if I had it my way then no one would ever know." I said calmly and I noticed Arty was clenched his wand while glaring at Sirius. My brother snorted then let my wrist go and walked away. I went back to my sit and had my three glasses of orange juice. I ate an apple and some bacon. I noticed that Arty was still scowling at Sirius and I sighed heavily. I started to walk, but I felt a bit dizzy and weak. Arty was walking beside me and then caught me before I even fell. Arty helped me walk back to the Slytherin common room.

My mind felt fuzzy and my body was like jelly, but I also felt like I was burning up. I panted lightly and Arty was carrying me to my bed. He placed me softly down and then sat down on my bed.

"Reggy, What is wrong?" Arty asked me softly and I licked my lips for they were dry.

"Dizzy, weak, burning up, and I can barely move now." I replied softly and I felt like I was sweating. "Arty, Please take off my outfit expect my underwear since I know it will be highly uncomfortable for you in the first place."

Arty looked a bit red, but he nodded and managed to strip me expect for my underwear.

"Thanks, Arty. Just place them by my arm." I said to him and I felt very tired. "You can stay or go outside, Arty. I feel exhausted."

I fell asleep and when I woke up there were some voices. I can move my arms and I put on my shirt along with jeans on quietly.

"Since, we can't get to that damn Sirius Black. The next best thing is his brother." A voice said smoothly.

",But he doesn't give a damn." Another voice said and I rolled my eyes.

"Regulus Black is rather pretty like a girl and small too." Yet another voice said and I'm starting to feel annoyed. "I wonder if he'll cry and moan like one too."

"Well we shall discover it." The first voice said calmly and I figure that person is smirking. I tried to remember where my wand happens to be at right now, but then I remember that Arty had it last. Damnit I'm completely and utterly screwed. I bet Arty didn't even put any sort of spells on my bed and more than likely at lunch. I didn't see their faces since they came up from behind and blind folded me.

"Let go jackasses." I snapped viciously and I heard four chuckles.

"No way, Regulus. It is a perfect chance for various things." One voice said calmly and I hate the fact that I do not have my bloody wand plus four against one is completely uneven. I was forced to drink something and I felt something being injected into me.

"Now, Regulus. We have you on some maverlous wizard drugs and they will make you completely defenseless within ten minutes. Also the liquid we injected into will make you beg, moan, and spread those pretty legs of yours after you have fainted for a short time." Three of them sneered and I hate them. I was not tied up just blind folded no weakness yet and from their voices I can tell their locations. I know this room and the common room very well. I will have only one chance and I do not want to know of their plans. I sighed lightly and then I ran for it. I managed to get out of Slytherin and into the hall way. I bumped into someone and I couldn't see. I realized that I still had on the blindfold and removed it.

"Watch where you are going." Potter snapped and I decided to look behind me no signs of them yet, but I'm not stupid enough to go back. I guess I have about two minutes before I go to pieces and I have no idea as to where Severus and Arty are at right now.

"Sorry—" I started to say, but Sirius arrived and I bite my lip. Also I noticed Pettigrew and Lupin. Son of a bitch I'm completely screwed and I will be embrassed.

"What the hell did you do, Regulus." Sirius growled at me and I tried to answer, but I felt like I was on fire and everything was moving. I know my brother is getting annoyed with me and I felt so dizzy, but I don't want my brother thinking I'm even more pathetic. I bite my lip and my eyes were starting to tear up. Potter didn't look angry, Lupin looked confused, Sirius looked angry, and Pettigrew looked curious.

"I can't stop this damn magical drug those bastards force fed and injected into me to get back at you." I managed to say and I fainted. My world was black and I felt nothingness.

**It won't work,**

**My brother doesn't care,**

**He thinks I'm weak and pathetic.**

**I try to keep on hoping,**

**I try to cling onto it tightly.**

**I'm falling into the abbess,**

**Being pushed over,**

**By almost everyone,**

**The three house, Older Slytherins, my own brother, my parents.**

**I'm keeping myself from free falling into the abbess,**

**The abbess of depression and suicidal acts,**

**The abbess of darkness and hopelessness,**

**The abbess of nothingness.**

**Yet I'm not there yet,**

**I still have a small hope,**

**I still have at least two people that care about me,**

**I have to keep on living, hoping, and wishing.**

**That one day will arrive,**

**When my brother cares about me again.**

Please Review and Thank You. There will be more chapters.


	16. Noticing

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View.

Please Review and Thank You. Please let me know what you think about this story.

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

When I woke up I smelled the fresh cleanness that could only belong to Hospital Wing and I noticed that I was alone. I sighed heavily and hated looking weak in front of my brother. There was no one by me and personally I did not care for at times it is better to be alone. I have no idea as to what they had drugged me with at all, but it seems like the affect has worn off. I'm not staying here and I will leave to go to class. I got off the bed and then stretched my body for a moment.

"Best be going now." I said to myself calmly and walked out the door, but then Arty ran into me. I was about to fall, but Arty kept me from falling to the ground.

"Sorry, Reggy. I heard about you passing out." Arty said to me and he still held me. I sighed heavily and then gave him a light shove.

"I'm not sure to Thank You for catching me or Hex you for running into me." I told him smoothly and he moved back giving me some space. "I will tell you what really happened in a little while. What time is it?"

"It is mid-afternoon." Arty replied and then I frowned lightly for I was out for quite a few hours, but then I heard the rain.

"I'm going outside." I said flatly and Arty followed me as I made my way outside. That was when I noticed that I was wearing a Gryffindor Cloak and then sighing heavily to myself for not realizing it sooner. I took off the cloak and then looked for a name tag on the inside of it. On the name tag was Sirius Orion Black. I smiled faintly and decided to return the cloak to my brother. I noticed he was with his friends James, Peter, and Remus.

"Here is your cloak." I said calmly to my older brother and held his cloak out towards him. I didn't care that there were other people around watching in confusion and being nosey.

"Keep it. Since I would burn it after all you wore it, Regulus. Next time I see you. I will hex you." My brother told me in a cold tone, my heart felt crushed, and I decided to drop the cloak down onto the ground. I turned around and walked away from him.

**I had a little hope he still cared about me,**

**But his words and tone crushed it.**

**He doesn't want anything to do with me,**

**His actions confuse me.**

**One moment my brother seems to care about me,**

**But in the next moment it is gone as if it never even existed in the first place.**

**I tried to give something back,**

**But he refused it and said he would burn it since I wore it.**

**It is not my fault.**

**I didn't ask for his help,**

**I didn't ask his friends to help me,**

**I didn't ask anyone to help me.**

**I didn't take his cloak from him,**

**Why did he even put his cloak on me last night,**

**If he didn't care.**

_Please Review and Thank You. _


	17. If Only

Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View.

Please Review and Thank You. Please let me know what you think about this story.

**Note made up the poem/song/whatever hopefully not too bad.**

"What is the matter?" Arty asked me in a low voice, I tilted my head, and had my elbows on the table.

"Everything and nothing." I replied simply and decided to make myself a plate. "Think they did something to the food again?"

Arty has brown eyes. At times I'm reminded of chocolate frogs, but the rest of the time his eyes look like mud pies that I use to secretly make with my brother a long time ago.

"We could go back to the Slytherin common room and call a house elf to bring us food." Arty suggested quietly and I smiled faintly.

"Oh, Arty. That would show that we are afraid and I personally am not afraid. It is not like they could get away with murder." I commented calmly and had a sip of the pumpkin juice. "I would rather suffer than to be a coward by walking away."

Arty nodded and he had a gulp of the pumpkin juice. I glanced over at my brother and his friends. My brother and Potter were grinning while Remus was shaking his head. I can hear Pettigrew giggling. I closed my eyes for a moment before reopening them and looked at Arty.

"Your skin is a mixture of scarlet and gold." I said causally to Arty and he looked at me with those mud pie eyes.

"Your skin is scarlet and gold too." Arty told me and I had my elbows on the table again.

"I know." I stated calmly and glanced around at the other Slytherins. Their skin is also a mixture of scarlet and gold too. The Hufflepuffs hid laughter behind their hands, The Ravenclaws hid laughter behind their books, and most of the Gryffindors were openly laughing. I ignored their laughter for it doesn't matter.

"Isn't it funny?" I asked softly, a faint smile on my lips, and looking up at the beautiful ceiling.

"What is funny?" Arty asked me and I decided not to say that it is rude to ask a question after a question has already been asked.

"How all of the other houses are so amused over such a silly little prank. They must think it is funny on how our skin is now scarlet and gold." I replied as I looked into his eyes and quietly laughed. "Isn't it funny, Arty? How they find pleasure in our so called humiliation and embarrassment. "

"How long do you think it will last? I hate their lousy laughter and I hate how the other houses treat us like scum of the earth." Arty said to me and I noticed his cheeks were red.

"I'm not sure, but I'm positive that a potion was used so it is bound to last. Calm down Arty for you are giving them a reaction. " I replied honestly and decided to finish eating my dinner. I could tell Arty was still upset, he was glaring at the Gryffindor table, and his fists clenched. We walked to the common room and sat down by the fire.

"I believe chivalry is dead in Gryffindor." I told Arty and he was looking at me. "Gryffindors might have had chivalry in the past, but in modern times it is six feet under and I see no chance of it ever being revived."

Arty smiled at me and he nodded his head in agreement. I closed my eyes, thought for a moment, and decided to speak to him about some of my feelings.

"Do I have any respect for any of the houses? I have none for they tend to bad mouth us and claim every Slytherin is a bad egg." I informed him and Arty was still looking at me. "It is rather funny, Arty. They act as if Dark Wizards and Witches only come from Slytherin House. Not all dark wizards and witches are open about their practices for they prefer to keep it hidden from the world. Personally, I do not believe a person can ever be completely evil or good."

I stood up and stretched my arms. Arty also decided to stand up, he covered a yawn, and I looked at the time.

"It is time for bed. Good night and see you in the morning, Arty." I said calmly and started to walk away.

"Good night, Reggy." He told me and I nodded my head before going onwards.

**I wonder if my brother believes a person can be completely evil or good,**

**I know that my brother does not like Slytherins for some reason.**

**Is it because he believes Slytherins are scum of the earth?**

**Is it because he believes all Slytherins are bad eggs?**

**Is it because he believes Slytherins are..**

**Isn't it funny?**

**How we are judged by some people from other Houses.**

**By Hufflepuffs, Ravenclaws, and ****Gryffindors**,

**Hufflepuffs are more quiet about their judgment,**

**Ravenclaws tend to write their judgment down on paper,**

**Gryffindors are more vocal and loud about their judgment, **

**Isn't it funny?**

**How we hear every single day,**

**Slytherins Are Bad,**

**Slytherins Are No Good,**

**Slytherins Can't Be Trusted.**

**One is bound to believe something when it is heard over and over again.**

**Isn't it funny?**

**How the other Houses wonder why Slytheirns tend to keep to ourselves,**

**How the other Houses wonder why Slytherins are cruel and vicious,**

**How the other Houses wonder why Slytherins are cold hearted.**

**The other Houses will never know the reason for they are blind and in denial.**

**We were not born cruel, vicious, and cold hearted.**

**Some of us became that way,**

**Due to family or Due to what people at Hogwarts have said and done to us.**

**To be honest sometimes it feels as if it is us against the three Houses,**

**No one is on our side expect us.**

**We were not born cruel and cold hearted, but turned that way so nothing will bring us down and make us feel worthless.**

**Turned that way by family or friends or by people in school or all of the above.**

**Isn't it funny?**

**Isn't it enough to make you cry and curl up into a tiny ball?**

**Isn't it enough to make you scream and feel the need to make them pay?**

**Isn't it enough to make you want to die or want to murder someone in cold blood?**

**If only we were not treated like we are monsters,**

**If only we were not treated like we are dark wizards and witches.**

**If only some of us were touched with a bit of genuine kindness and warmth from others,**

**After all a bit of kindness and warmth can go a long way for someone unloved,**

**Not every Slytherin has a warm and loving family.**

**If only some of us were given a chance instead of being rejected within a moment.**

**Maybe then some of us would have turned out differently.**

**Oh Yes,**

**If only...**

_Please Review and Thank You. _


	18. Chapter 18

**I Do not own Harry Potter. Still in Regulus View. Regulus has no idea Bartemius Crouch Jr which he calls by the nickname of Arty has a crush on him that grows by the day/night. Please Review and Thank You to those that have reviewed. Please let me know what you think about this story.**

This morning Severus decided to have breakfast with Arty and I. For some reason Arty looked annoyed, his arms crossed, and he looked a bit sulky.

"Severus how is everything going for you?" I asked calmly while putting a few scrambled eggs onto my plate and filling my cup up. "I hope that everything is going fine for you and that your pet is still among the living."

Severus raised an eyebrow, I picked up my fork, and looked at him with a raised eyebrow in return.

"Oh, I'm not using sarcasm. As if I would ever use sarcasm on you dear beloved Severus Snape. It is not as if I would ever dare do such a thing to you of all Wizards." I stated causally to Severus and then turned to the sulking Arty. "Arty, Why not smile and wave at Severus for he is finally gracing us with his presence after I forget how many days? Smile, Wave, and pretend to be as cute as an ugly button."

Arty gapped at me and I noticed that Severus was rolling his eyes.

"Regulus, I'm not sorry for mingling among my peers." Severus informed me and I placed a hand under my chin.

"Said peers who use you just because you are rather remarkable in making potions." I told him calmly and Severus gave me a look. Arty was over gapping like a fish, he looked interested, and seemed to be paying attention.

"I know that already, Regulus. I'm positive they are not using me for my unforgettable looks nor for my stunning personality. I'm also positive that none of them wish to use me for anything sexual in nature." Severus commented to me in that dry tony and he ate some of his food. I snickered for a moment before eating my food and Arty was quietly eating.

"Severus, You really should tie your hair back when making potions." I said to him and he shook his head at me.

"No, Regulus. I refuse to put my hair back into a low ponytail like a girl." Severus stated firmly and my eyes narrowed at him.

"What? Putting ones hair back is not being like a girl. I put my hair back from time to time even when I'm not brewing potions. That is quite insulting, Severus. You didn't notice I have my hair tied back at the moment." I said coldly, my arms crossed, and Severus sighed heavily at me.

"You are being sensitive, Regulus." Severus told me dryly and his head was slightly tilted.

"You are being insensitive." I informed him and my arms were crossed. "I believe tying ones hair back-"

"Reg, You look cute with your hair being tied back." Arty suddenly said which caused me to blink and stare at him in disbelief. I briefly noticed that Severus was shaking his head, quietly snickering, and I chuckled lightly to myself.

"I shall take my leave." Severus said to me and I noticed he had a faint smirk on his lips. "I hope you have seen the light of my statement of how girlish it is to put ones hair back into a low ponytail. Have a nice day, Regulus."

"It is not girly to have ones hair tied back, Severus. I will still wish you a nice day despite you saying it is girlish to put ones hair back into a low ponytail." I stated firmly and ignored how quiet Arty had became after saying to me 'Reg, You look cute with your hair being tied back'. I watched as Severus gracefully walked away, black robes flowing, and so on.

"So I only look cute when my hair is tied back?" I asked teasingly to my best friend Arty and shook my head at him. "Arty, Arty, Arty. Sometimes you say the most hilarious things."

I stood up and stretched for a moment. Arty sighed for some reason, stood up, and we walked to class together.

**_Please Review and Thank You. _**


	19. Chapter 19

**I Do not own Harry Potter. Still in Regulus View. Please Review and Thank you.**

It was lunch time, Severus was sitting with his peers, and I believe he was feeling bored for it was written all over his face. I was making myself a plate and Arty was next to me on the right side.

"Hey, Reg. I have something I want to tell you." He suddenly said to me and I do not understand why Arty simply did not just tell me what he wanted to tell me. Perhaps he is trying to more dramatic?

"What is it, Arty?" I asked curiously and had a few sips of the pumpkin juice.

"Next week is when we can to Hogsmeade." Arty replied quietly and I wonder why must he have such a low tone at the most oddest of times, but to each their own.

"Oh, I had almost forgotten. Thank you for the reminder." I commented causally and ate some of my food for it seems like Arty will be quiet for a few minutes.

"Well, Reggie. I heard some of the older students talking about a place called Madam Puddifoots." Arty whispered, I snickered to myself, and had another sip of pumpkin juice.

"I have heard about Madam Puddifoots." I said calmly and thought for a moment. "Oh, Yes. It is where the hormonal teens go to kiss, hold hands, and feel rather sweaty. Plus I have heard it is rather cramped and has tacky tables not to mention the chairs."

Arty's cheeks were flushed like a cherry, those eyes wide as a plate, and he was gapping like a goldfish. It was an amusing sight. I snickered and finished my pumpkin juice.

"We could go there last, Arty. To Madam Puddifoots and have a bit of fun." I whispered in a low voice and there was a faint smirk on my lips. "You know sneakily cause a bit of mischief since the couples there will be too busy with one another to notice a thing. We can plan later in complete detail inside of The Abandoned Dungeon. Anyway, We must be heading to class now."

**_Please Review and Thank You._**


	20. Chapter 20

**I Do not own Harry Potter. Regulus View. **

Arty is biting his lips and to be honest it is annoying, but at least he is not biting his nails or messing with his hair.

"Reg, What if people start talking and-"

"Settle down, Arty. Do you honestly think I would go with you to Hogsmeade?" I asked calmly and for some reason he looked almost ready to cry. Arty can be rather senstive at times. "I have a plan and it shall work. I'm going to disguise myself for I have no plans of getting caught, Arty."

"Should I disguise myself too, Reg?" He asked me and I grabbed his hands while smirking faintly for his question is rather funny to me.

"No, but you will be acting." I informed him calmly. Arty blinked his eyes at me and titled his head towards me.

"Reggy, What do you mean?" His voice sounded curious.

"You will act as if I'm your girlfriend.. My girl name shall be Arcturus." I told Arty and his eyes went wide in shock. "I will disguise myself as a girl. You will be boyfriend in order to keep others from possibly hitting on me which would then cause me to hex them for their foolishness. I know some hexes and a couple of them are quite illegal, Arty."

I let go of Arty's hands, smirked at him, and leaned against the wall.

"Should I look like a naughty bad girl or a righteous good girl?" I asked casually and Arty's cheeks turned red like an apple. "Bad or good tis that is the question."

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	21. Chapter 21

**I do not own Harry Potter. Bartemius Crouch Jr Point of View.**

I'm in love with Regulus Black and he has no idea about my feelings toward him, but it is for the best.

"How do I look?" Regulus asked me in such a cool and collect tone of voice. My cheeks are burning like flames, heart racing, and blood rushing down towards my private area. Regulus is always so beautiful, tempting, and alluring.

He is wearing a black skirt, blood red six inch high-heels, a long sleeve dark green shirt, and a black scarf. As always there is no hair on his legs and I'm tempted to touch him.

"Arty, Cat got your tongue?" He asked me playfully and grabbed my wrists while faintly smirking. "Remember my name shall be Arcturus. I'm going to wear a blond wig."

"How should I act?"

"Hold my hand. Smile, laugh, and look into my eyes." Regulus informed me and I held his hand. "Hold my hand tighter, Arty."

I held his hand a little tighter, enjoying the feel of holding his hand, and Regulus tilted his head.

"Also make sure to kiss me." Regulus said calmly and my cheeks flushed. "On the cheek not the lips for I do not wish for Arcturus to be thought of as a scarlet woman."

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	22. Chapter 22

**I do not own Harry Potter. Bartemius Crouch Jr Point of View. Have a Happy Early Thanksgiving!**

**Broken Promise**

**By waterrain**

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"Hey, Arty. Let's practice you kissing me on the cheek. It wouldn't do if you messed up." Regulus stated causally, his arms around my shoulders, and he is not wearing a blond wig yet. We are alone and he had locked the door with a spell that he learned from his mum. I felt nervous and my hands on his dark hair. His hair is soft like silk.

"Okay, Reggy."

"Call me, Arcturus."

"Okay, Arcturus." I said before pressing my lips briefly onto his warm right cheek. My heart is racing, cheeks burning, and Regulus looked at me.

"Make sure to linger slightly, but not too much." He informed me. I kissed his left cheek, my hands made their way to his slender hips, and after a minute moved from his cheek.

"Much better, Arty. Hands off for a moment because I need to get that blond wig on my head." Regulus told me, I moved my hands away, and my cheeks are flushed. I watched as he placed the wig on and his dark hair is not visible. I'm amazed that he can walk so gracefully in those blood red six inch high-heels.

"What kind of underwear are you wearing right now? Boxers or briefs?"

"Neither, I'm wearing panties that have tiny red hearts all around it." He said causally and lifted up his black skirt showing me that he was telling the truth. "Now let's decide on pet names for each other."

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	23. Chapter 23

**I do not own Harry Potter. Regulus Point of View. **

**Broken Promise**

**By waterrain**

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I'm not one hundred percent sure that Arty will be able to pull off pretending to be my boyfriend. His face is flushed, he looks nervous, and I closed my eyes briefly wishing that I had a clone of myself. Mummy always said sometimes to make sure the job is done right that you do it yourself, but of course afterwards kill the people that couldn't get the job done for you or torture them for several hours . I do not have any desire to kill Arty.

"You look too nervous." I commented in a low voice, my heels clacked together, and he looked at me.

"Arcturus, What if I mess up?" Arty asked quietly and I smiled at him.

"Good thing I'm not my mum because she tends to kill or tortures the people that fail her. The torture normally lasts for several hours. My mummy doesn't tolerate failures." I whispered into his ear for it would due for anyone to over-hear my words. "If you fail me, Arty…I'll just ignore you for a week."

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